Sloth by day and drunk by night!

It's official, contrary to popular belief, i am actually a lazy fecker!
Who's have thought it?

Felt shabby still on Friday, was home at 4.50pm as i'd called at Tradex and picked up a cheque on the way home, so was having a napette on the couch before AP arrived with the film.
Was rudely awoken by Marlene ringing to say have a nice holiday, yeah..........i will, when we go 3 weeks on Monday...........silly moo!

Tried to make an effort, by NOT being in my p.j's when he arrived, so i opted for a roll neck sweater with pyjama bottoms, unfortunately by the time he arrived i'd slopped stew down the front of jumper!!
Had a really ace night, King Kong was v.good, i needed some wine for my throat.....which fixed it, Bedfordshire midnight, pounds spent.......nil!

Saturday was up and about at 11am, message from youngest brother on answering machine................time 1.45am, could i get myself down to the Horncastle takeaway as he's been twatted by a 17yr old girl and needed my assistance. Too late!

Spend the day eating..............(brunch, 1 bacon sandwich and melon, Dinner, stew, 2 slices of tiger bread and chocolate cake), watching videos, picture perfect and the full monty and laying in front of the fire doing a jigsaw in my comfy leisure suit!

Phoned KF, who was coming out later after her and T had been for a meal (oh is he keeping you away from Matt by any chance?), Spug was at the rugby then working behind the bar, but said she'd finish work at 7.30pm........got ready in slow motion as doing nothing all, day takes it out of you!??!

Arrived at Club at 7.45pm, Spug hadn't clocked off as it was too busy, Andy was with his mates, so i got lumbered with Hemmy, who continually tried to kiss me and told me i was wearing too much make-up and Cloughy who tried to put his hand down my top.

8pm and Spug came to save me, ate two salad sandwiches and announced she was off home as Andy was at her flat, oh woe is me...........friendless and all alone at the boys club!

Was saved by nice boyfriend who let me tag along with him, Matt, Woz, Blacky and JP.............hurrah!

So i was in a round with 5 boys, it was okay i'm a better drinker than Andy, but keeping up with Woz, was nigh on impossible (he's a racer not a pacer), ended up sat with the rest of the "footballers wives" yawn!!!

Thankfully Andy chose to sit with the girls aswell, so i wasn't left on my tod talking about mundane drivel with them. Had a good night, spoke to Paul for 1/2hr about his ex Mad Lynne, saw Ap chatting to Maria, Guys girlfriend so shot back over as i was jealous. Found out he was chomping at the bit because i was talking to Paul.
Katy and Grant turned up, there was quite a little posse of us at the end. AP did his usual at midnight, slumped, refusing to finish his 14th pint and begging to go home, so action replay of last week, him asleep, me watching t.v in bed, drinking wine and smoking fags!

Sunday,Andy had taken himself off home to watch sky sports after a mammoth sleep and horizontal jogging, i could barley face another day alone after Saturday (maybe something to do with staying in Friday) had bacon and egg, did the laundry, EE omnibus, the usual malarky and phoned Ruth who readily agreed to come to the pub.
Got ready, called at Marlo's for 1hr, who told me elder brother had been beaten up in a road rage attack (note to self, phone middle brother to find out if he has also been brayed this weekend).
Steven came in from golf and went straight to GCC (much to Mothers disgust as he is jobless and hadn't eaten that day),i got to Ruth's at 6pm, just in time to catch Mark and his Mate Reiley "happy slapping" in the kitchen while eating angel delight. Txt Ap who didn't want to come to pub :o( so me and Ruth dropped the car off and "waddled" to Spoons, had a pleasant evening, we were joined by Spug, Andy, Mark, Reiley and Tina arena at 9pm after she'd finished her 14hr shift at work. Luckily i wasn't in a massive drinking mood so i had 6 pints of lagertops from 6.30pm till after 11pm, but lots of nice laughing and chatting.
We all departed around the same time, Tina and i shared a pizza and a cab up, i wolfed my four slices down and was in bed at midnight.

Had a shit nights sleep, woke at 3am till 5am, then when the alarm went off it was like rousing the dead, still made it to my desk and having a good day, it's a party atmosphere in the office today as we have top samples in, a 4ft plush grizzly bear, cordless vacuum cleaner, table top casino poker board, cot and baby swing chair, Elizabeth Shaw and vodka shots chocolates and a range of George Foreman (not Dave Goreman) grill, steamer, kettle, toaster..............amazing what turns up when you actually do some work.

ill

It's weekend eve, which is always good.
But all is not well.

Didn't have a good day yesterday at all, on Monday i felt like a had something stuck in my throat it got a bit worse on Tuesday, by yesterday lunchtime i couldn't swallow, even water..........thing is i don't have cold or a bad chest (leave it), i have no flu symptoms at all, but was nearly in tears........ace when you work with all boys, loads of sympathy.

So off i trot to the quacks at 4.30pm, nice lady doctor, who stripped me and checked me over, told me my oesophagus was in spasm and to take these drugs and if no better by weekend, go to casualty...............great!

Home for 5.20pm, stripped bed, put winter feather quilt on, with American quilt on top (i like my head to be touching the ceiling while i'm sleeping), made lamb chops, sprouts, carrots, and jacket spud, it took me one hour to eat it, felt glum as can be, took my poorly ratty temper out on the cats and was nearly in tears when AP turned up.

Spent all night being fussed over, lying on the sofa, tried not to laugh (hurt too much), when he wrote me a cheque for Scotland and forgot to fill in the box and thought my name began with a C..................how cute is he?

I was in bed for 10pm, watched DHW'S through one eye and was spark out at 11pm.

Feel a bit better today but not eaten anything yet, so we'll see!

On the upside, coz i'm ill i get to stay in tomorrow and watch King Kong on pirate with nice Boyfriend, yippee! all my dreams have come true..........
And not a shepherds pie in site!

Nowt to write home about

All much of a nowtness at per usual.
Muddled through Monday......note to self, keep off the vino on a Sunday night as it makes me feel groggy for the 1st day of work! bag o'shite!

Was as lazy as can be once I'd finally returned to my abode. Bath, p.j's. warmed up Chinese, the box, jigsaw, bed and book.

Yesterday i was a wee more active, nipped out at lunch, bought a few bits, loads of birthdays coming up, Ethan, Freya, Dad and Valentines day (not that I'm expecting a card, he'd be far too embarrassed, maybe he'll get his Mum to fetch it??!!).

Ordered my new car, Citroen C4 Coupe, hoorah! have been working all week, mainly through lack of emails from Matt, so quite hyper by the time i got home at 6pm, had 1/2hr to get ready, picked Steven up (not seen him since Xmas Day), he's done all his dough in on a Tag watch, the nobba!
Drove to pizza hut, it's so overpriced in there......and we had to wait 20mins for a table. It was my turn to pay...............i kept thinking we could have two massive Horncastle specials for a fiver! anyhow..........
We shared a Med pizza, garlic bread, cheesy wraps and chicken wings.

Arrived at the showcase with 5 mins to spare, how's about that for timing? saw Brokeback Mountain, what a great pile of steaming shit??!!?
I was trying to get into the sentiment, how they must have felt being gay and a roughneck in the 60's, but i really couldn't relate to it and spent most of the film gawking at the stick on sideys and moustaches. I then realised the 2 people suggested watch it were actually benders.............so glad it wasn't Andy i took to see it!

Didn't get home till 11pm, i don't like going out midweek it really throws me, fell straight into bed and read till midnight!

No news or plans today, seeing AP tonight from 7.50pm onwards, don't know what's happening at the weekend, stuck between a rock and a hard place really as he doesn't want to drink on a Friday (as he loves his rugby too much) and by the time i meet up with him on a Saturday he's incoherant, we'll have to start eating out on a Friday night, as there's only so much on at the flicks you actually want to see.

What i really mean is lets stay in on a Friday, watch Dvd's and eat takeout like sloths or erm.........pikeys, in fact lets spend all our giro on backie and tinnies and get neighbours round for a screaming match.........??!!?

What am i on about?

The weekend

All loveliness.............smug twat that i am!

Friday, left work sharpish and got in home, sorted cats, got ready, had a bagel and some Doritos, shot out of the door at 6.45pm..........over the Pennines, got to Matt's flat 1hr later!

He opened his present as he is 4yrs old and couldn't wait till today.
So i made him cut his cake (in for a penny in for a pound), had a slice with a nice cup of coffee.............Andrew came home and tried to get us to play cards, i was having none of it!

I changed while Matt humoured him and we set off to the Karaoke round the corner.

It was v.loud, we should have sat in a back room to chat and moved to the main part when we were more sloshed and needed to sing..................hey ho!
Matt's friend Janet arrived, she was very nice and chatty, we all sang, I sang Annie's song, Janet sang Call me and and your So vain, Matt sang Mack the Knife and another one...............we only had 5 pints and before we knew it, it was midnight!!!

Janet was driving so dropped us at Churchill's, we had another one and chatted, then we'd run out of fags and i wanted food after a measly 6 lagertops.........yep i was flagging!

Matt nipped to the taxi rank and got his phone back that he'd lost on New years eve! i was filling my face with Indian nibbles next door......bloater!

Cab home, Matt got stellas out of the fridge i looked at them with distain, got my p.j's on and fell onto the airbed at 1am.

Saturday i could hear voices, Andrew had arrived home and was eating Egg McMuffins on the end of the bed, decided to get up and make coffee, Matt and i chatted till 11.30am, drank coffee, smoked fags and ate bacon butties.
Got to the carpark...........no ticket, yippee!

Dropped Matt at Tescos and hit the M62, home for 12.15pm...............yep you guessed it, went back to bed.
Read for an hour and slept for 3, didn't know what fucking day it was when the alarm went off, had more bagels (sliced the end of my thumb off), fruit salad and picked KF up at 6.30pm, to go see the rugga buggas at the club, it was shite at the club, we had 2 shandies, i gave Leeny Sarah's £95 for the Dam of Amster, then we cabbed it into town, met up with Ruth, Mark, all Marks mates, Rach and Dean..........we settled down in Spoons and had a few more Beers, Ap and all his sporting buddies turned up....he looked mullered and it was only 8pm.

Woz and John wanted to see their birds so all the lads went to the Comical, Ruth left Mark in Spoons and we all nipped there too for one, me and Katy stayed put with the boys, Rach, Dean, Ruth, Spug and her bloke headed to the Turnstiles.
Had 3 more in there, Andy was wankered, he must of thought we were in bed, he was wrapping his legs round me and stroking my hair and kissing my nose.............freak!

Chatted to Deano about the dead Whale, then noticed Matt W and Katy holding hands, while the cats away ???!! (at Heath). tut tut!

The 5 of us went back to Spooners, John, Carl, Woz etc had all gone to bed, Ap was really flagging..........asked him what had changed his mind about me and him, the answer sounded like that pissed old coot from the Fast show, it went a bit like this "Stanny's stag night, Spain, spot of bother, R Kid, reight do, drinking, reight bird at home who really likes me, what the fuck am i playing at? glad i did".............all the while looking dewy eyed at me. Chatted to Caroline, Nicola, Katie etc, Kim was trying to get me to go to a recording studio with her........................fookoff!

Dragged Andy home, i watched the end of Ransom, while he was sleeping. The old romantic!!!

Sunday he must have been really hungover as there was no action till well after 9am, spent another 3hrs under the quilt, up and about at midday!
Andy went home to get ready to meet Deano at the pub at 3pm, poor boy!

I pottered all day, washing, vaccing, spent a good 1/2 hr ridding staircase of cat hair wearing rubber gloves, EE omnibus, fetched Ruth at t.time and we went to visit Mother, barking as always, she told me now they lived in the bungalow they are 3 miles nearer to Bridlington.....ok!??!!

Left at 7pm, took Ruth home, then i spent the evening eating chinese, started a new jigsaw, watched Armageddon on DVD, had 5 glasses of wine, Sam phoned at 11pm, don't think i was much help, didn't know what to say..........took myself off to bed and watched BB live till 1am.

Last but not least Happy Birthday Matt, not that he'll read this, he's on leave till Wednesday!

Towards the end of the week

Get fresh at the weekend! at least that's what Mel and Kim sang and that's what i intend to do!

Have had a v.busy week, decorating Tuesday as you know, Wednesday, saw AP after my bits had been waxed, Sarah phoned and we guffawed about boys (even though mine was sat at the side of me), Amsterdam and omnibrows.
Andy was pulling my leg and saying he'd had a quick glance at the bathroom and he couldn't really tell owt different about it...................cheeky fucker!
We chatted excitedly (well i did) about Scotland, he was only concerned about the menu in the hotel and would there be steak and chips?

We divided the night between, the FA cup, Big Brother and Desperate housewives. (because that's only fair and will save fratching!!!)
Zonked out soon after...........


Busy at work and play yesterday, well play included tescos, cleaning, washing, struggling with 10 ton wheelie bin up to main road and other light chores last night.
Made a chicken curry and phoned mad barmy Helen for 53 mins, laughed so much my sides ached. She's very keen for me to meet up with Gilly in Edinburgh...............ooh we'll have plenty of time!!!
Watched crap TV and read in bed.

Am fooked off with work today, working weeks are one day too long..........still 1 hr 40 mins to go.

This evening i'm joining Mr.Stephenson in his pad in Mancs for a night out darn *anal street, seemingly we are meeting his work colleague Janet for a spot of Karaoke, then homeward bound in the Morning, well afternoon by the time i get off the inflatable mattress, to meet AP at the club after his triumphant victory against West Leeds...............or so he says!!!!

Just checking in

Hello, I thought I should just register my existence and let you stop worrying that my lack of blogging was a result of being eaten by a lion.

Well I am not blogging what happened at the weekend because I don't want you to know what happened as there were a number of things I am not prepared to go into and it would be churlish of me to blog only bits.

So far this week I have been tired everyday. This is because Andrew is a vampire and emotionally blackmails me to stay up late every night and I do not sleep very well so 2am bedtimes combined with waking up every 40 minutes do not lead to a productive, friendly or happy Matthew.

Anyway I am going to bed before midnight whatever he says!

I have caught the Derby decorating bug.

I'm not going down there again, i'm fooking knackered with it all.

No it's not really Sam's fault (or 10 men Bates), it started with, "i might change the colour scheme of the bathroom" daydream.

Before i knew it, i spent yesterday lunch purchasing fluffy green bathsheets, towels, facecloths and bathmats.
B&Q for paint, rollers and brushes. blah blah!

Oh god what have i started? fired home, no time, to waste, starting prepping bathroom, masking tape fooking everywhere, 9.15pm, last night..........bath panel, sporadic blue tiles, cupboard doors and edging painted now in sage green, much better...............broke off to have my tea, watched shameless.

Once the paint had dried, put all new nicknacks, candles, vase, and new toiletries (yes everything had to match), in place and went to bed a very happy but dizzy (paint fumes) bunny..........oh read for an hour and fell asleep at 1am.

No news from Monday, called at Ma and pa's on the way home for my weekly visit, no call from Matt as Andrew is on leave, so tea, p.j's, t.v (finished my jigsaw), bed and book.

Even less news today, have paid for Scotland (need to start being nice to Beth and Tina, my all year round catsitters), was quite afraid when Jim said it was such a bargain, him and Mum would like to come with us.......................aaahh!!!
Andy? can my Mum and Dad come along with us on our 1st holiday away together?................eek!
Need to pay my wage in at lunchtime and call and get a stainless steel bathroom bin.
Off for waxing and stuff at Nicholas tonight then seeing AP, no other plans or decorating spates ahead, just chilling and looking forward to getting drunk at the weekend and having at least one lie in............

That's my lot, over and out! OH! i have spare BLUE, plant pot, glass decanter, bath cream, facial wash, toothpaste, mouthwash, toothbrush, flannels, towels, bathmats, bin.........oh dear! what a waste of money??!!?

A brief History of Time

No, not the floppy headed, dribbling, seat on wheels kind... just lil' old me.

Dedication to Karen... for reminding me to blog.

Been many a month since I was on here, in fact, with a change pf PC, I had actually forgotten how to get here - still here I am.

A brief update for anyone remotely interested. Just moved to Brighouse on my lonesome, well that's partly true, I have moved to Brighouse, and I am living on my own, but I am most certainly not lonesome.

Finally, and yes, I do mean finally cut the cord that bound me for so many a decade to the creature I shall refer to only as James, identifiable by the 666 tattoo a top his fast dissappearing scalp.

Am still working in old job, but at least two potential new one's very close on the horizon, which sadly will result in me being back working in the big smoke - yes Leeds to yorkshire folk.

Now with new squeeze, and very very happy with it. 6 foot, of dark, hairy manliness - slightly new, ahem, registration plate than the last one, let's just say I have the odd essay and study book lying about the place - and I am saying no more about it.

Well that's the last 5 months of my life updated. - Hope everyone else is well and still with us.

Story about a friend of a friend of a friend

Apparently this guy comes into FoFoF's shop when nobody else was around (he's an Estate Agent) and goes "Oi! Come over here."

He goes over the guy in the wheelchair says: "I've got a gun under my coat, now give me your phone and money."

So he does.

What we couldn't work out is why the guy who was being robbed didn't just go and stand behind him, or at the very least run after him once he left the shop and hit him over the back of the head.

Bloked up and stuffed

Have spent nearly all weekend with lovely boyfriend and haven't stopped eating.

Left work early on Friday and called at the Showcase to pick up cinema tickets (to save queuing behind 1000 15yr olds, who are dressed up to the nine's as going to the flicks on a Friday is a massive night out).
Home, had some cheese on toast and fruit salad, bathed, dressed casually and Mr.Porrait collected me at 7.00pm (well 6.50pm as he is ALWAYS 10 mins early).

Saw Jarhead, which was very good, Andy laughed like a drain all the way through, then piped up at the end, "i didn't rate that did you?".
We then drove through Cleck to see if there were any fights and i got him to drop me off at 10pm as i was tired and ravenous and couldn't be assed to go out drinking that late on...............i'm OLD, get off me back!

Demolished chilli, pasta, Doritos, salsa, houmous and chilli nuts, felt fit to burst, so waddled off to bed at 11.30pm and slept very soundly on a full stomach.


Saturday awoke confused to fuck, where's my hangover? best get ready for work.........was highly delighted i felt well, did a merry little dance and a few laps round the sofa, tesco's, carwash, dropped money for Amsterdam off at Spug's, called at Sis's (she was out), pet shop, filled bird feeders, bathed, had egg in an eggcup with soldiers......then Chris turned up...Hooray!! we watched the darts and drank tea, he stayed an hour and i said i'd see him that night.
Spug arrived at 6.30pm, she nicked some socks and we got a cab to pick up Katy and Tina, arrived at Aldo's at 7pm........we ate like kings, i had my usual melon, mango and prawns, 1/2 tomato garlic bread and shared a Malibu chicken and fries with Spug, we waded our way through 3 bottles of wine and were plonked in Spoons at 8.30pm. Full as a butchers pup!!!!!!!
Chris arrived at 9pm, we found some seats and sat and drank and drank and drank!
Spug, Tina, Hayley and the Krays went up to the old house.

Andy and all the other Rugga Buggers wobbled in at 10pm..............Andy sat with Chris and chatted about the ashes, teeth bleaching, rugby, the weather (get off him, he's my friend). He was mullered and being really cheeky......but Grant was the best, he was absolutely bewildered that i went out drinking with my dentist...........yes that's right we've not been friends since we were 16, i asked him out for a drink after a filling as i was short of mates! nobba!
CRUFC and their birds took over spoons, Woz had had 10 pints of cider and had to go home, Quinny was giving me fashion tips, Blacky was being nice as pie all very bizzare.
Andy got drunker and drunker, his eyes were like slits, he couldn't finish his pint and he was trying to put his hand inside my bra..................taxi!
In bed for 12.30 and had a filthy fcuk while watching BB, collapsed unconscious and awake at 7.30am for a re-run.

Up again at 10pm, it's very tiring this copulating business, we both begrudgingly got out of bed at 12.10pm and got ready for Derby.
Had a good run and arrived at 3pm, to the girls shrieking and waving their arms around, thought they were excited to see me, realised they were wearing in-line skates and were just trying not to fall over.
Had a lovely afternoon, played Buzz (highly addictive, dvd interactive, music quiz), Sam cooked Chicken Chasseur with all the trimmings, Cassy and her Blokey Rich arrived at 5pm, more games of Buzz, ate so much i thought i'd burst, but still had 2nd's of trifle..........Andy wanted to nap after his tea, but thought it rude..............Molly had us in hysterics over her School dinner ladies and their walkie talkies, more games of buzz, nearly nodding off, i accidentally drank 3 glasses of wine, so Andy had to drive back.............hhahhhaaaaaaaaa!
He loves it!!!!!!!!, turned down Sam's offer of taking the 1/2 bottle of vino she had left to drink in the car (i'm not that thirsty).
Home for 9.15pm..........yippee, had a snog.........in the house, p.j's on, fussed my cats, jigsaw, t.v., few more glasses of vino, while watching the beach...bedfordshire at 1am.

Alarm went off this morning, SO did not want to get up today...had a tantrum like a 12yr old.
But now i'm here am happy as a pig in shit......funny that!!!!!!

Thirsday, weekend eve, whatever you want to call it!!!??

Quickie update on the life and times of moi.............all much of a nowtness, which is the way i like it!

Tuesday evening, did feck all........had sausage, liver, onions jacket potatoes, sprouts and carrots.
Watched EE, Holby, did my jigsaw through BB, up to bed to watch Shameless then had a natter with Sam under the quilt (no she wasn't actually there, on the phone......idiot). Read till 1.45am.

Good day yesterady, David moody, but i aren't bothered!! wanted new tan high heeled boots to match new handbag.............found some in Faith for £30...bargain!

Also purchased 2 new house plants to replace 2 i'd killed and RSM'S birthday present in the sales.
Cut a bush back in the garden yesterday t.time with some long handled loppers i'd hoised from work, then potted 2 new plants.
Spug phoned to find out if there was a single person supplement for Amsterdam as Jo is also attending, bringing the figure to 9!!!!
Watched T.V with AP and ate pizza last night..........fluttered my eyelashes to get him to come to Scotland with me:
He readily agreed in no time..........
My thought bubble "romantic week in Scottish castle, nice food, theatre, long walks, shopping, sightseeing in and around Loch Lomond, Edinburgh and Trossachs national park".
Andy's thought bubble "5 day hotel room shag fest"....................and maybe a trip to a whiskey distillery!!!

Weekend plans.
Friday...........pictures, followed by food or drink, but just coke for AP as he was wellied last week on 5 pints (which he insists was 7) and felt shit Saturday for rugby.
Sat............rugby club...........i'm gonna wear my new boots.
Sunday........i am taking Andy to see my oldest and dearest friend at Borrowash towers, for a trip to Elvaston castle and a lovely meal cooked by Sam.

Finally..........today's news, Paul had phoned in sick which has never happened before, i had crumpets for breakfast instead of cereal, off to Morrisons now for supplies and a key cut (for catsitters and maybe AP) AND it's Emma's Birthday..............eeeh!! 27 today!!!


HAPPY BIRTHDAY EMM............xxxxx

Car crash Tuesday

Well dear me! What an evening!

Left work at 5.15, got home at 5.40. Tried to wake Andrew but he was having none of it and didn't get up till 6.25. Then he proceeded to do nothing and say nothing for half an hour and at 5 to 7 said well I guess I'd better ring work and tell them I'll be late. If he'd have pulled his finger out he'd have been fine. So I checked out coaches and there was one that would have got him to work but when we got there the coach driver was being a cunt and it wouldn't take hi. Walked to Victoria Station and he got a train and was 40 minutes late. To be honest I couldn't wait for him to go. When he's tired he is completely incommunicative and I hate it. I despise the fact that he takes his tiredness out one me, is moody, rolls his eyes when I ask him questions in order to initiate a conversation and bites my head off for no reason. I was really fucking stalled by the time he got on the train and was really looking forward to getting completely pissed.

I went for a pint or two. Well when I say that I had about a million: I started off with a double whisky and then had 3 pints in an hour and took it from there I don't really remember how many I had but I had a few too many to be honest. I sang 3 songs and got chatting to a couple of blokes, 27 year old Carl and 18 year old cute chunky gay-but-has-a-girlfriend virgin (well gay virgin) Anthony. Chatted to them all night - they were great and we were going to go clubbing.

Anyway as I said I got plastered and I chatted up this indian guy called Jackie. He was cute but not great and I was wanting to get my own back on Andrew but this guy said he was straight. Then I chatted up this fit guy who I'd seen by the bar. I bought him a drink, he was called Hiefcbeqbkjsdcj or something like that and was a Turk. He was very keen to fuck me but it seemed that that was his complete sexual repertoire: I only wanted a bit of a flirt and possibly a naughty kiss but all he wanted to do was stuff his pink cucumber into my dirtbox so I shuffled off.

What then happened is a blur. I went to the New Union and had a pint. Jackie was there (straight my arse) and I even danced (you can tell how pissed I was). Then I went to Cruz but it was closed, as was Essential (thank god) so I went back to Churchills, had another and got a kebab and then (I think) a taxi home at about 2am.

Slept in this morning. Andrew woke me up at 8.47 when he got home and he was as nice as pie - obviously feeling less tired - kissing me and just being nice so I felt glad I;d not been evil last night. Had a fag, suggested we had sex and watched a bit of telly and didn't get to work till 10.20!!!

Chewsday

Yesterday was a good day.
Went to Sheffield to pick up a cheque, nice trip out a.m.
Bought new Cardigan and handbag at lunch with my Xmas voucher from Spug.....ace!
Afternoon flew.
Home, did my hair, tea, Matt phoned again, t.v, jigsaw (leave it) book and bed!

8hrs kip..........

V.organised day today!

Up early and went to Tescos before work.
Phoned Mike and arranged a date for shower fitting (finally).
Phoned Alan to ask him to pay for it fitting (told him I'd pay for the shower, hahhhaaaaaa free from work) and told him to fix the security light!
Cancelled Catalogue membership.
Getting quotes in to chose a new car as the Megane lease is up 3rd March.
Txt Katy to tell her no point going to Amsterdam in Feb with the boys as we are off 14th April for Spug's 21st. (need to break this to Andy and talk him into going to Scotland with me).
Numbers for Spug's weekend bash on the North sea ferries are as stands, Sarah, Katy, Matt, Spug, Moi, Jenna, Tina, Beth!!
Emailed Matt and Sarah to tell them to send Amsterdam Cheques in post.
Txt Steven to see if he wanted to go to flicks tonight (but he's working).
Emailed Sam and Ruth.
Bought book from Waterstones at lunch and fetched everyone a Pret.
Filled out all birthdays on new calender.

Thinking about doing a bit of work now!

No weeks plans whatsoever........in fact nothing planned till Matt's Birthday, when he gets his finger out and lets me know what weekend he would like to celebrate.................yes i need to know now...........i mean now, as AP is moving in Weekends after i get back from Manchester!!!!!

The feeling's mutual

Friday i left early to go to the doctors, never saw one though as after i'd sat 5 mins with my magazine i was told i was an hour late and to come back Monday.........the lying cunts!

Home at 5pm though.............bonus! had a tuna sandwich, got a wriggle on and Andy picked me up at 7pm, went to see Mrs. Henderson presents at the flicks............v.good (i cried), Andy also admitted to really liking it, but i've not to tell anyone as it's a girl film.
Now the intention was, to go to the pictures and keep out of Cleck watering holes as we've o.d'd on booze over xmas, however seeing a 7'o clock showing did not help as, who wants to go home at 9pm?

We sped home, dropped AP's car off, nipped in and said hi to Gill and Dave, Andy's Mum diagnosed my rash (Andy gave me some cream, hence saving me £6.10 prescription...........result!!!!).Wish my Mum was a nurse!
Called at the Talbot and had a pint (bumped into Emma and Keiron, who were wellied ,couldn't get shut of them), had one in the Commercial and chatted for England, called in the Old house and there was Spug, Andy, Tina and Jo........yippee! had a couple in there and one in the station, me and AP decided he should start coming and staying the whole weekend and bringing his stuff for rugby (as long as i don't have to wash his filthy kit everything will be fine).

Shared a cab home, i stayed up till 1am....watching E4 and drinking wine as i am a knobhead!
Saturday felt sick as a dog, shouldn't mix the grape and the grain (even though they do in Alpen and noone gets hangover from eating that). Dragged myself out of my pit and picked Spug up at 2pm, went to the club and sat drinking coffee at the bar with Trish, we then trundled down to the stand where me and Spug spend 90 mins chatting and not watching Andy play rugby................well to be fair we did break off everytime there was a scrap.
I'd been warned by Andy not to start wining when people were sitting on top of him or kneeing him in the face as everything was under control..................but i couldn't understand why everytime there was a pile up he was at the bottom, Spug filled me in saying that it was the position he played and he wasn't purposely trying to get in the thick of all the trouble.

Doh!!
Left after the game finished 5-0 to Wibsey (i've not to go watch again as i am a bad omen and that's why they lost). Dropped Spug off had a bath to defrost and some proper winter food, then back to the club at 6pm, had a few shandies, nattered with Katy and Spug, still felt sick...boo! AP went into town with the lads, we followed on in a cab and spent the rest of the night in Spoons, talking about holidays mainly (Ap has asked me to go away in the summer for a week or two..........yippee), along with Amsterdam and Spug 21st trip away, that'll make it 3 foreign holidays in the next 6mths...........oh dear!! better get a paper round.

We left at 12, dropped John, Debbie, Kim, Claire and Nichola at eastern spice (as me and Andy had room in our mini bus)...........bedfordshire soon after.
He was ligged on the bed getting on famously with my cat (who he hates, talk about a change of heart).
Had a jump, sleep, jump, sleep....ditto and finally got ap at 12.30pm Sunday, watched the end of Grease on ITV2...........

Then the usual flurry of washing and Sunday chores............called at Mum's (in my pyjamas) as not seen her since new years day.
Had a lovely evening last night, watched t.v, had nice food, chatted to RMS on the dog and bone,Ethan also phoned me to say thank-you for his Christmas presents, amazing how a 2yr old can call me up from Newcastle and know the right number and area code, had a bottle of vino and started a.......... cough, splutter.............jigsaw................fuck-off i am 37 in 3 months.

Not much to say

Had a very quiet weekend so not much to say but I get told off if I don't blog so I'm going to do it now.

Friday: roasted a chicken and had roast potatoes made with goose fat - lovely! Went out for a drink later on.

Saturday: read a lot, bought cling film and foil, forgot to buy scotch tape. Had a steak and kidney pie and a chicken bake from Greggs for lunch. Bought 2 7" cake tins. Made an orange cake. Read more. Drank a litre of Stella and half a bottle of Port and half a bottle of Sherry.

Sunday: read even more, didn't even get dressed.

Big Brother Bollocks

Chantelle Houghton: Good luck to her. Given some of the relative no names in the house, she won't do too bad. Worried about Maggot and Preston catching her out as they should be aware of whom their competition in the pop arena is. Also slightly worried in case someone asks her to sing her most famous song, I want you to pop your man muscle into my love chute or whatever it was supposed to be.

Michael Barrymore: What a drama queen. If he'd have spent any longer with the crowd, the series would have been over. Yes it is a come back and you have been away Michael, you have been hiding in New Zealand ever since a man was raped and drowned at one of your parties, don't you remember? Anyway good luck - lets see if you manage it without a nervous breakdown.

Pete Burns: Pete I love you, you are a freak and that's what's so good about you. Your nastly lips bleeding pus isn't much of a look but I can forgive many things for such a camp straight man. Good luck, I want you to do well and have a second career!!

Traci Bingham: Never heard of you, you're never 10/10 on the looks front and I hate you because you're a nobody being paid a fortune to come into the house because you used to be on Baywatch.

Maggot: Is it just me or does anyone else think that its weird that Goldie Lookin' Chain were on BBLB about every week during the summer and now Maggot is on CBB? I hope he does well. I like the ironic nature of GLC and I hope that he rips the piss out of all of them.

Rula Lenska: Don't worry Rula, I may be the only person under 40 who knows who you are but you shouldn't fret. Nor should you worry that you've spent your entire career playing on the old polish aristorcracy thing and being a bit of a posh bint and are now in the Big Brother house: desperation for fame is a reassuringly common thing and you shouldn't worry about being surrounded by common oiks. You were married to Dennis Waterman after all.

Jodie Marsh: What happened to your ski slope nose? It was the only think I knew you for and now you've had another nose job. I suspect you're not quite as clever as you claim Jodie: 3 A levels do not a genius make. We'll have to see and lets face it, if I can warm to Brigitte Nielsen, Peter Andre and Carole Thatcher, there's hope for you but if you want to come across as a nice piece of work you'll have to get involved in scrubbing the bogs and washing up and I can't see it.

Dennis Rodman: You are a freak. Are you trying to look like Satan? If so, good because its working. Oh and Dennis, your fame won't work on most British people. Some do know you well, others are aware of your existence and to others you are a new phenomenon so don;t think that just because you're being paid £150k that you needn't do anything, you'll have to work hard to stay in the house.

Faria Alam: Its not because you slept with two men at work that you're thought of as a slapper, its because you slept with two men from work, then took work to court and then sold your story to the paper and then went onto Big Brother and looked into the camera and said in all honesty "oh no, I'm not seeking fame". Yes you are you , star fucking, slutty, wannabee and I don't like you.

Samuel Preston: Never heard of you but I do know of the Ordinary Boys. You're pretty, look straight, are young and are male so I reckon if you keep your nose clean you'll win. I'd quite like to have really dirty sex with you as well so keep that thought in your mind.

George Galloway: I salute your indefatigability. How you dare come onto this programme is beyond me. Do you have no shame. You are paid over £1100 a week to represent the constituents of Bow and Bethnal Green but will be incommunicado for over three weeks. Can you imagine what that does to the reputation of MPs ... no probably not, if your own reputation is anything to go by. I really don't like you and hope you end up being stabbed by one of Dennis Rodman's satan spikes on his nose and dying horribly of septicæmia.

I am mightily annoyed

Sod the old phrase about better to give than to receive. I am pissed off that I go to the effort and expense of sending someone a card and then I don't end up receiving one in return.

I have just been updating my Xmas card database and the ratio of sent cards to received is now 58%, a drop of 12.5% since last year. That's bad.

The people I sent card to but didn't get them back from are:

University friends: Adrian Glover, Andy Gould, Dave Bannister (although he was giving money to charity and said so at the beginning of December by email), Matti Watton, Nick Gibbs, Rob Gould
LSE friends: Alan Revel, Alison Johns, Chris Cylwik, Eleanor Lowenthal, Kate Bennett, Kevin Haynes, Mark Thomson, Richard Pursand, Sally Welch,
Salford Uni friends: Dave Goodman, Janet Savage, Mike James (no, 1 office card to 5 people is not enough - its 1 card each!)
Cleck family/friends: Matthew Westlake, Nicola Squires, Warren Stephenson

Apologies to those who did send me a card if I didn't receive it, let me know and I will amend my records. I know I sent some that never got there. This is why I operate a 2 strikes and you're out policy: it's unlikely that one person's card goes missing 2 years in a row.

The people I've not had a card from for 2 years running are: Alison Johns, Chris Cylwik, Dave Goodman, Eleanor Lowenthal, Kate Bennett, Kevin Haynes, Matthew Westlake, Mark Thomson, Nicola Squires, Richard Pursand, Sally Welch and Warren Stephenson.

If they either can't be bothered to send me one or care so little about Christmas cards that they don't bother sending them then they'll cope without one from me. That's 12 cards, 12 stamps, 12 address labels and 12 Christmassy messages less to worry about next year.

Better

Amazing what a good nights sleep can do.

Still really knackered when i got home last night, but so much to do!
Stripped bed and washed all bedclothes, put on clean bedding.

BSM was selling a vhs/dvd combi for £50 so decided to buy one, but couldn't leave it for Andy to set up, had to take it all out of the box and start faffing with R2 leads/Scart leads and other crap i knew nothing about.

Took other DVD and video upstairs and set those up no problem.
However when it came to me setting up the new one in the living room and trying to attach it to ariels and the freeview and the t.v.................i thought my head was going to go.

Took a short break to make a chilli con carne, ate one portion and froze 3, then made the pasta dish minus the chicken which i forgot to defrost (i'll add that tonight) and left that covered over in the fridge.

Got back to the project involving 1000 leads, tv, dvd, freeview box, video.........blah blah blah, managed to get a picture on 5 channels, but couldn't get the dvd/video or freeview to work.
Took myself off to bed at 10pm to watch Lost, after unloading washer and putting all wet bedding on clothes airer (i'll wear that later in my next fight with AP).

Was asleep before 11.15pm and slept through to the alarm this a.m............heaven.
So 1st to work, well apart from eager new boy, going to have a productive day, off to have my cereal and banana now....................have left my phone at home though and need to tell AP the flicks are off, i have jobs for him to do, involving lots of leads and electrical items.

You cheapskate, you maggot, you cheap lousy faggot!

Well I suppose I should really account for my Christmas period.

Friday 23 December 2005
We were given strict orders that we weren’t to leave until 4pm but Linda came into the office at 3pm and told us to stuff Tony and Malcolm and just to get off. My train was at 3.35 so I had to hang about a while but before I knew it, I was home.
I went out in the evening in Cleck with Karen, Katy, Spug et al. Got nicely merry and after the Old House I took a pizza home.

Saturday 24 December 2005
Me and Dad went to do same last minute shopping. Glue, a stand pie – Metcalfe’s oven had broken and so we had to go to Collins’s. Went to Hecky and on the way to Dewsbury, my mum rang with exciting news that Warren and Caroline had turned up and announced that they’d got engaged. We quickly finished our shopping and went home and had a drink with Warren and Carol to celebrate. Her ring was very nice and looked very expensive. My dad, me and them two went to my auntie Rena’s and uncle Jim’s and then to Alex and Jill’s. Went home and had fish and chips for late lunch and then popped down to Warren’s. All of Caroline’s friends were there doing their secret santa and after that was done Caroline announced that her and Warren were getting married and they all jumped up and screamed and kissed them both. Then Warren and I went to the pub where he announced to his mates that he was getting married. His mates were a bit more subdued with a few “nice one”s and “well done mate”s being the only responses. Karen came out and after a while we popped back to the ‘Spoons and met up with MJ, Lee, Katy and Sarah. We went to the Commercial, the Old House, the Station, The Rose, The Turnstile and the Wickham. After the Commercial I was feeling a bit fragile – I had had 7 and it was only about 8pm so I had a coke at the Old House. Karen was panicking as she needed and I mean needed to find AP so she pissed off from the Old House to find him, then when we went to the Rose, she was there with him and Carol. Sarah left at the Turnstile and Karen and Andy quickly followed suit so there was only me, Lee and MJ left for a curry at Mucky Joe’s!

Sunday 25 December 2005
Got lots of presents, didn’t drink much, ate too much. Watched hardly any TV. In the evening Alex, Jill and Alex came round and we played games and had fun

Monday 26 December 2005
Put a bet on a horse with my dad and bro and watched the rugby. Then we started drinking. Went to the bookies to see the race but it wasn’t on and we didn’t win anyway. Dad dropped me and Warren off at the Pack where we drank with Carol and her family before Sue dropped us back at the Club. After another two (probably about 9 overall) I had to go home for a nap and something to eat but was back out afer a couple of hours but by then everyone was flagging. We headed off to Claire’s had some nice snap and then everyone went home. Think I was home by about hast past nine.

Tuesday 27 December 2005
Had a really bad cough. Slept and watched TV all day. Went to Karen’s party. Had a really good time but wasn’t feeling great. I had a can of bitter made into shandy and 2 stellas. And a mere five fags. Didn’t get home till half past two and was v tired and knew I had a cold coming on.

Wednesday 28 December 2005
Mum dropped me off at Huddersfield Station at 12.20. Was home by 1.15 – it was nice to see Andrew who had worked that night but had stayed up to see me, we were in bed by 2.30 and asleep by 3.30. Woke at 8.00 but Andrew wasn’t to be mustered so I watched telly till midnight and went to go to bed but Andrew was sleeping diagonally on the bed and I was reluctant to wake him as he needed to sleep so I slept on the sofa. Woken at 2.30 by Andrew who had risen, finally. We watched Lost, which I’d taped and then I went to bed.

Thursday 29 December 2005
Asked Andrew to wake me at 7-8 but he didn’t so I woke at 10.45. Andrew went to bed soon after (am I ever to see him?). Went to Asda and spent £71. Stayed in at night and played computer games. Cold was bad and I was bunged up and feeling sorry for myself. Went to bed at 4 telling Andrew not to stay up to o late as he had work and needed the sleep but he finally came to bed at 8.30.

Friday 30 December 2005
Chris and Jayne were coming but they rant at 12 to say that they weren’t because the weather was too bad so I watched TV and did nothing. Then at 3.30 Chris rang to say they were on their way. I tidied a bit, but not much and got Andrew up as late as I dare, only to be told off for not waking him up sooner. He went off to work and I got dressed and C& J arrived. We had something to eat and 2 pints in the Rain Bar before heading off to Canal Street where we had another couple before coming home because Jayne was feeling ill.

Saturday 31 December 2005
Got up late, had breakfast and headed into town where we did a bit of shopping and got Andrew’s outfit. Went home, woke Andrew who got showered and put on his Robin outfit. He looked nice! We went to the Rain Bar for some late lunch/tea , Andrew in his outfit. It was funny! Andrew went to work and we went to the party. There weren’t many there: Andy and Michelle; Rob and Vicky; Rich; Me, Jayne and Chris; Andy’s landlord, Austin and his sister Jill; Shaboo and Napoor. We played a word game to do with sex and then we tried to see how many words for vagina and penis we could think of (vagina: 62, penis: 48). Played a drinking game, had some nice grub and before we knew it, it was midnight!! Celebrated in the usual manner. Tried to ring Andrew but could only leave a message. Got my mum out of bed and had to send texts to everyone else. Had a nice (but very alcoholic) pudding and then everyone was sloping off so we rang for a taxi (lucky 4th time which is OK on New Year’s Day morning at 2am).

Sunday 1 January 2006
Andrew arrived at 5.40am and told me he’d tried to ring me but the taxi driver had answered. I’d left it in the cab and so I’d have to go and pick it up. Got up late, made bacon sandwiches for Chris and Jayne who quickly headed off home. I watched TV all day and dozed and finally (20.15) went out to get my phone. Was asked to come back in an hour so I went for a pint or three in Churchill’s where I was accosted by a lesbian who insisted I buy her a drink and then proceeded to steal my fags. Had a double whisky, sang the Darkness on karaoke. Went back to the taxi office but my man had still not started so I went away, had another 3 pints and went back again – he’d not come in so I staggered off home getting to bed v late and feeling v tired.

Monday 2 January 2006
Woken by Andrew when he came in at 7.40. He wanted to play on the computer so I stayed up while he played. Actually I sat on the sofa and slept while he played. We both went to bed at 11.30 and I had another 2 hours sleep. Took his outfit back but it was closed. Bought a Laurel and Hardy DVD – Block-Heads – my favourite L&H film ever!! The Accused on DVD and a Roy Orbison CD. Bought groceries and a few other stuff. Went home, watched Andrew play computer games all night while I chilled, relaxed and made the most of my last evening before going back to …

Tuesday 3 January 2006
Work … aaaarrrgghh!!!!

Tired and tetchy

Am so sleepy!

Used up all my weeks energy yesterday.
Actually worked yesterday afternoon, had a quick chat with Ap (all is back to normal), he wants to go to the flicks tomorrow (i'll phone him at t.time to ask if we can stay in, as i am a lazy fat lump).

Home early as no traffic, meaning some cunts are still on annual leave.
Washed works towels and all my rugs, mopped kitchen floor, bath, hair wash, p.j's, did 2 weeks ironing.......boo!
Sided all Xmas presents (finding room to put all 32 of them).

I'll tell you what i got as am v.bored.

Necklace
Bracelet
Calvin Klein Eternity moment
Burburry weekend
chenille scarf
Little britain series 1 dvd
Little britain series 2 dvd
baileys
taboo
thorntons chocs
ted baker gift set
clock
lynne truess book
photo frame
dolce and gabanna perfume set
teddy and mug
lipgloss's
smellies
Celia Aherne novel
shot glasses
mixed vodkas
gold scarf
cushion
pyjamas
vodka chocolates
next voucher
desk tidy and address book
full bottle wine glass
baileys chocolates
touch of class chocolates
red wine
cross stitch

phew!!!!!!!!!!
"didn't she do well?"

Had pie chips, peas and gravy, watched EE, Holby, then chatted to Sam (poor Whitter and her car tramas tup North), watched Shameless, then a bit of Rita, Sue and Bob too.
Was so wired couldn't fooking sleep and was still awake at 4.30am.................worrying about the fact that i have nothing to worry about, so thinking some thing to worry about up.

Alarm went off after 4 hrs, WTF?
Am so so so so tired, we have a new boy starting today, cannot be assed to work so am intending to nip him and rob his dinner money.

This evening i'm going to cook/batch freeze chilli con carne and a bacon/ mushroom, chicken, with tomato and mascerpone sauce pasta.............then that's my lot!

Want to stay in this weekend, am so sick of boozing and feeling shabby.......over the holidays i went to the pub 5 times and attended 6 parties............i am also absolutely sick of the sight of all Cleck cricket/rugby club lot and their girlfriends.

Maybe i'm just over tired!??

2005 in Review

Men slept with: 10
Boyfriends: 1
Brothers who got engaged: 1
Pints: Too many to count: 750 – 1000?
Cigarettes: Too many to count: 4000?
Days off sick: 5
Days of leave: 25 (36 if you count bank holidays and closure days)
Weddings attended: 3
Trips abroad: 4
Money spent: Around thirty thousand pounds
Increase of official neck size: None
Increase of official waist size: 2”
Ties: Approx 115
Pairs of cufflinks: Approx 50
Times robbed: 2
Times moved house: 0
Christmas Cards sent: 48
Christmas Cards received: 29
Years older: 1
Years wiser: 0

Partied out

Holidays in brief

22nd- Went out for Warrens birthday, just 20 or so of his great mates in the Commercial, got absolutely rangooned, ended up with Andy, John and Claire back at my house, eating cheese on toast drinking wine and listening to Xmas carol's at 1.30am................slippery slide.

23rd-let out of work midday, back to bed, out in the evening with Matt, along with a few others, had a swift gallon, karaoke and pizza's.

24th- went last minute shopping, bought Andy loads more presents, met Matt at 5.30pm in the Commercial, left Ap and all the lads playing killer pool, met Sarah, Katy, MJ and Lee in Spoons, did a mini pub crawl, got drunk, couldn't find Andy, so trailed round Cleck on my own from pub to pub with my skirt tucked in my knickers, wailing his name like an unhinged witch, found him in the Rose and crown and all was well with the world, had one more drink then we both went home, made him a romantic meal of raw pizza and kettle chips at midnight pissed out of my head...............followed by a bit of festive shagging.

25th-took me a good hour to rouse AP and take him home, up to Mothers and had a lovely day, got loads of good presents, had an ace meal cooked by Jim, (just me the parents and little Bro dining), home at t.time, vegged a few hrs...........Ruth, Mark, Steven, Mum, David, Donna, Mum, Dad and Andy came up in the evening, drank like bastards, played silly board games, swapped presents with AP (he came up trumps, much to my surprise and his Mum and Dad got me perfume and a chenille scarf).
Everyone left at 1.00am, i cleaned up buffet and shit and fell into bed a very happy bunny.

26th-Met Andy at the club, after the annual rugby match held boxing day.......daytime drinking is evil, Matt went home for a disco kip and a ham sarnie, we all ended up at Clare's for a buffet (i just had wine), Andy had to put me to bed at....cough hiccup,...........9.30pm.

27th-did nowt in the day, Rach, Dean and Meg came at 7pm, then left when all the other party revellers arrived, 15 in total, lovely evening spent drinking, eating nibbles, playing board games (triv too hard, Articulate okay, bin game, cool, Scene it, fine and by the time dingbats came out everyone was too pissed to care) Katy and Grant left 1st at 11.30pm, Hayley and James soon after, Katie and Caroline at 12, Matt and Sarah after the 1st game of dingbats, John and Clare at 2am, which left the stragglers, Deano with no home to go to, Beth still wading her way through the jar of pickled onions, me, Tina and Andy.
They left at 3.30am, i washed up and got to bed at 4am.

28th-Bottle bank, Next sales, tescos, vaccing up, lots of laying on the couch and the 1st booze free night that week. Early to bed.

29th-Didn't lift a finger, read loads, watched shit t.v., had Sam and Cassy round for lunch, made chicken and bacon salad, crusty bread, was v. nice, they were hyper as they were on a 4 day road trip,Sam insisted on showing everyone her new bra, Cassy was just talking v.fast again ..........mainly about boys, early to bed, booze free night number 2.

30th-Me and Ap set of to the coast in the snow (as you do) had a few hairy moments, but had a lovely day, fish and chips, ten pin bowling, went to see the lighthouse........all in all very romantic, soon to be spoiled by me acting a complete cunt later that evening and nearly getting myself chucked.
Met Sarah, Spug and the Yarmouth nurses Leanne and Katie at 7.30ish, left Andy with the boys, while us girlies did a mini pub crawl, by the time he came to find me in the 4th pub i was well on my way, pints of diesel, jigging about, regal.....horrid horrid drunken mess.
Home, then i turn into a drunken nightmare, call Andy a wanker, insist we are fallen out, go to sleep in spare bed, come back into bedroom wearing wet washing from airer, scream like a banshee some more.
Then fall into bed wearing t.shirt and knickers and forget all of the above.

31st-Awake by cuddling up to nice boyfriend and get yourself elbowed in the face, prevent him from leaving at 8.30am by laying in front of door like a draft excluder, waling "but what have i done wrong?, i don't remember getting home".
Lig in bed all day, feeling sorry for myself and my poorly head.
Do the wobble in the evening with 12 great mates and have a merry old time, meet boyfriend at 10pm at one of the cricket lads girlfriends house party, get given the cold shoulder by AP, drink 100 cocktails to make it all better, get taken into headmasters office by him and have a stern talking to, start crying uncontrollably, cry all make up off, tell the whole sorry story to anyone who will listen, ignoring the fact, that Andy says I'm not chucked, he just needed to calm down.
Cry all over Warren, who drags Ap outside and calls him a tit, suddenly all is well, I'm forgiven and he's admitted he's been a bit harsh.............considering he was the one pouring the last drink down my throat before the blackout the previous evening, i should fucking think so.

1st- Awake alone, even though we'd not fallen out, he slept at home to fully calm down.
Pick him up at 3pm, wish Gill and Dave a happy new year, then drive to Family new years party on fathers side, held every year at Ossett football club. Poor Andy was as good as gold, we sat with Marlene, Jim, Ruth and Mark, he played pool with Mark, never muttered a word that my entire family could all star in Shameless, plus he drank orange, so i could have beer and he drove my car back.
Comedy moment, when he said "it's rough in here Karen, there's a sign up in the pool room, saying, please keep a vigilant eye on your children after 2 failed abductions".
Taxi please.............
Left at 6.30pm, Andy got some beer from fridge while i nipped to loo, walked to John and Clare's for yet another fucking party, all the lads, watched the darts in the living room, while girls sat in the kitchen talking about wedding and tampax.
Left at 1.00am, home for some proper making up.

2nd- He left early doors, saying nothing was up but he wanted to get off, Hmmm?
He went to the football with Deano, i took the tree down, vacced, 2 wash loads, phoned Matt, had some yummy food and watched t.v till 11pm, then to bed liquor free so as could be bright eyed and bushy tailed at me desk this morning.

3rd-Good start to the day as called for bread, milk and paper...........dropped a 4 pint carton of milk in Kwik save carpark, which went all over my jeans.
Still am determined to turn over a new leaf and knuckle down this year, find some good gear and not skive 90% of the time, so what have i done? spent the 1st three hours, shopping and blogging!!!!!!!!!
Oh Me!!!!