Another hectic weekend

I'm jiggered, am sat at my desk vowing to have a serene, relaxing weekend the one coming up!

Last Thursday i couldn't get out of here quick enough, have decided Leigh is a cunt, he's been stickering the holiday chart up with glee to show David on his return from fishing, that I've had time off for the dentist, scan, sky man, funeral etc. I'm livid, if they weren't valid excuses i could understand it.

So Thursday evening Andy brought all his weekends tackle up, i called at Mums on the way home, we both got to the abode at 7pm, me unloading shopping, him taking wheelie bin up and sweeping leaves from the path.
I had a long soak in the bath, chilli and rice for tea, AP had resumed his normal position of sofa pressing and channel surfing (i'd like to meet a girl, who flicks through 15 channels in the adverts). We watched Primal fear DVD, the Catherine Tate we'd sky plus'd bed late and kalled till 1am in bed, was exhausted Friday morning, when i awoke an hour earlier than i needed.

Showers and bacon butties, at St Luke's for 9.30am, it goes without saying the service and the crematorium were very upsetting, everyone piled back to the club at lunchtime, where Mick Collins was rushed off his little feet, Spug, Rach, Dean, Our Ruth and Steven, Andy, Mark etc were all firing into the pints, grrrr! i sampled all the J20 flavours as i've never liked lager.

Lots of laughing and rowdiness ensued, said farewell to all family and dragged 1/2 cut boyfriend away from Waitey and the bar, homeward bound, to a broken Sky+ box (that lasted a whole week, i told you it's me and electrical items) I'm flapping around phoning the sky helpline, while Andy had taken supplies upstairs and set up camp in the bedroom, where he's happily watching the darts (sky multiroom, who's idea?).

I had another bath, donned on hen night costume, said Au revoir to happy as a pig in shit boyf, who couldn't wait to see the back of me, him and Meg are now under quilt......grinning..........i SO wanted to stay home, felt drained and tired, the last thing i needed was 27 pissed up party revellers and a night out in York....a sober one at that!

Fetched Katy at 4.30pm, made good timing and we were outside the Encore Ramada at 5.45pm, i decided to abandon car and risk a ticket, rather than schleck round looking for an NCP, phoned Nicola, who was out buying Evian for the next morning.

Sat in the room, Katy was rooming with Nic and her wicked step sister Claire who was so far up her own arse it was untrue, everyone met in the bar at 7pm, Debbie was ever so apologetic about guessing i was pregnant at Guy and Maria's engagement, everyone were drinking the bar dry, i had 2 Pepsi's and a packet of salt and vinegar.

Then we all left restaurant bound, flashing devils horns and blow up tridents in hand, 28 matching t.shirts, Mason's Mum was saying "congratulations and how's your Auntie Gill baring up?" i was nodding politely as i didn't have a fooking clue who she was.

We arrived at Ask, 15 minutes walk later, Caroline had already taken her shoes off. All the club wags were at one end, i was in-between, Caz and Claire, Claire is v excited about being an Auntie, we chatted all night about the Porray brothers..........funny!
To say i was so hesitant, it turned out to be a good night, i really enjoyed myself...had good chats with Katie, Claire, Kim, Katy......Debbie was mullered, farquahar and run out of money, well drinking 10 bottles of Peroni at £3 a shout? I leant her the money i had left.........the meal was fine, a bit pizza express like, Bruschetta, Tropicana pizza, chocolate fudge cake and ice-cream (for the baby) i coughed up my Score and Claire and Katy walked me back to the car at 11.30pm, to only 1 parking ticket...reight do!, got in the car and sped off into the night.
Home at 12.15am, Andy was in the same position i'd left him in, he'd been to the Chinese and even eaten that in his squat!!??! , got ready for bed, fed cats, then we talked till 1.30am, TOO many late nights! i need my sleep.

Saturday:
Andy was up and about after jogging (i pretended not to notice he'd been watching the England rugby match with the sound off since 8am), off he went to rugby, i climbed back into bed, thinking i'd have another hour, awaking at 2.15pm............oops!
By the time, i'd fed cats, stripped bed, put the washer on, had a coffee, sided clothes from airer, mopped kitchen floor and changed, it was 3.30pm when i got to the pool, swam till it shut at 4.30pm, then rushed round like a loon, putting on clean bedding, had a bite to eat, more washing, tumble drying, bathed, got ready, booked the table at Aldo's, phoned Matt, nipped to tescos for bread, bacon and rushmooms, made it just in time for Andy at 7.10pm, he'd had 4 pints and was being all lairy.......struth!!!

Got chatting to Gill about baby activity centres in the ELC, she's also arranged for me to go to Aquanatal classes with Andy's cousin Sarah (who's baby is due the day before ours)........cheers!!!!, I've met her once, i'd love to be her new best mate.........it'll be kind of nice actually, sharing common ground, but i don't want you to think I've gone soft!

Chatted for ages, Andy was gassing to Dave about today's rugby match, meaning we were late to Aldo's....oops!
Pino wasn't bothered, the other 11 were upstairs, NOT late, unlike us......we were seated in no time, Sarah, Sera, Viv and Matt at one end, Ruth, Tina, Spug and Hayley in the middle, Moi, Beth, Rach, Andy (who'd turned into a gurning gobshite) and Auntie Gill at the other end.
Lovely meal, i made light work of my Melon, mango & prawns, Farfalle alla moda, 2 pieces of tomato garlic bread, glass of red wine and chocolate profiteroles........split the bill at £20 a head, the people who had steaks and chicken dishes got a good deal, unlike poor Beth and Ruth who'd ordered kiddies chicken goujons....oh dear!!! Still no one grumbled...........i was full as a butchers pup!! Auntie Gill went off home, us remaining dozen went to Spoons, i had a J20, Andy couldn't finish his pint (he said he was full, he was drunk as a lord truth be told).

Was a tad embarrassed he was telling Auntie Gill, Rach and Beth about the morning our baby was conceived, how it was a "rush job" as we were off to Brid..........the shame!! then when he'd got himself an audience he was off on one, who needs Steven, when anyone can make me the butt of their jokes???!!!

Dragged him off home and threw him in the bedroom with the sky remote......... out of harms way!!!
I read mags downstairs, watched living t.v. (which is the only channel we can get downstairs) changed every clock in the house and listened to him heckling the darts "go on lad"........
Waited for the snoring, then snook into bed, nearly passing out at the lager fumes! how times have changed!!??!


Sunday:
Was grateful of the extra hour, SSMS, full English breakfasts, i phoned the fooking sky man again and arranged for an engineer to come out on Tuesday (daren't tell Leigh he'll be straight to the holiday chart with his stickers).

Got dressed, sorted the cats, Andy took the car home for clean clothes and came back for me at 11.30am and we hit the M62 Manchester bound, followed Matty S's destructions and were at his new suave flat for 12.20pm, HOW POSH? had a guided tour, quick coffee and we set off into town, 1st stop Mothercare world, showed Andy the pram i'd picked, cooed over cradles, baby baths, cots etc, then headed to the Centre past some homeless drunk outside ToysRus!!!

Opted for a cab as i am fat and lazy, booked our seats at the Odeon, then had snacks from Greggs, mooched round the shops and had a drink in a nearby pub till it was time for the cinema..........saw Click which was the best of the lot (we'd seen all the good films and Matt didn't fancy Saw III), i must admit i suppose horrors aren't typical Sunday afternoon viewing.
It was okay, came out..........to the night!!! it was pitch dark, called at Sainsbury's.......then got the free bus to Picadilly.
Had another coffee and a cream cake at Matt's flat, made him change, dropped him at the Lowry, then got on the M602, tired Tim or what?

Dropped Andy home, clambered in the bath, no point staying downstairs with no t.v, watched The Royal Family special at 9pm in bed, read a bit and was spark out by 10.30pm.


Monday today, have paid parking fine on company credit card, okay day i suppose am fretting about Andy at his new job today, i hope he's not being bullied, what if the bigger boys have taken his dinner money off him!

I want him to like it and stay and work hard, earn loads of cash to keep me and baby Porray, that boy is my ticket out of here!!!

Losing me drawers!

My wild working work, went something like this.

Monday:

I bloody hate Monday, this one was made worse as every time i tried to walk my pants fell down, the elasticated panel pockets, added to the fact that they were "low rise" cut and too big, ultimately meant that they were sliding down my thighs as i went about my work.

Nipped into town at lunch, bought a belt in DP's for £5, asked to wear it straight away, ace........problem solved ... pants in place, only when i sat at my desk it was digging in to my tummy and crushing the baby, not good, have put maternity jeans in the back of the wardrobe until am really fat and they can stay up unaided!

Also went to the M&S sales, bought some jogging pants for swimming and generally slobbing about in and some new boarding trousers (why they aren't called combats anymore is beyond me, Matt will be up in arms, Opal Fruits, Marathons and now this..........he's still trying to get his head round Hillards being bought out in 1985 ish).

Anyhow I'm very pleased with my bargains, £8 for both pairs....i'll definitely get my fivers worth out of my boarding trews!!
Called at Nic's on the way home to pick up my hen night t.shirt and chose my main course for tomorrow evening, phoned Katy F and demanded she come with me to York in my car and doesn't meet Caroline and co. in Leeds train station.

That sorted, home, had a surge of energy...bathed, p.j's........2 weeks ironing all done and sided, cats in, then we had fish for tea, bed to read at 10pm as always.


Tuesday:

Was in quite a good mood at work, although i still hate it (roll on the day, when Andy gives me housekeeping and i can stay at home). Bought some cute baby stuff in Boots, you know the typical jackets with ears on the hoods, snazzy bibs, ickle hat, furry socks....i mustn't go mad though, Marlene'll play hell if she finds out I'm buying things this early, (in their day, they sent the husband out to buy all the baby essentials after they'd given birth and were in Crossley maternity home, for their weeks stay).

Stashed baby clothes in secret suitcase under my bed once home, usual t.time routine, then whistling happy as larry boyfriend arrived (guess who has 5 days off work before the start of thier new job?) pleasant evening of pie, chips, peas and Jackass 2 the movie......early to bed.

Wednesday:

Nice day on the whole, Mum phoned me at work for 1/2hr natter, which is okay as David is in Kenya fishing, bless my Mum, her and Dad are going to buy us the pram, Andy is well pleased (tightass) that the 2 most expensive items are covered. I went to Mothercare at lunch and found one i really liked, need to show Andy......like Men are bothered, as long as it's not pink he'll push whatever!
Bought a 0-3mths t.shirt and 2 pairs of jogging pants...........stop it Karen! i have switched my drinking and smoking addiction to shopping.
Andy phoned, as he's on holiday he thinks every evening should be like the weekend and asked me to look what was on at the pictures, with me being a lazy, pregnant, i don't go out if it's dark and raining type person, i bartered with him, not sure if i won, but DVD's, sexual favours, a roaring fire and chocolate cake suddenly seemed more appealing to him, than the Showcase! funny that!

Spent the evening doing all the above, Matthew phoned for a brief chat, but didn't stay on long as i was eating tea and watching National lampoons animal house.
Up the apples and pears after cleaning Megs' sick up, to Andy yelling "she's got it on the dvd!!!!!" no Andy, she's missed it, but it is all over the new pine table.

Today: that's Thursday, have done no work, blogged, emailed Matt and Ruth, been to Morrisons and the bank and am now going for my haircutting..........might be longer than an hour....to Cleck and back and a cut and blow, but who cares?

Busy weekend as always ahead, just the funeral to get through tomorrow!
Then Nicola's hen night in the city of York.
Saturday, must swim this week...in the evening Sarah is back from GBY and a whole posse of us are dining at Aldo's.
Sunday me and AP are off to Matty Stephenson's new flat by the looks of things.
This is after the clocks change and we get one hour extra in bed.

So i'll update you all on Monday as to wether the weekend penned out as planned.

See ya, wouldn't want to be ya!

Buxton spring water

The last 3 days have been very busy indeed.

Weekends are for chilling, not running around like you've ants in your pants....what's all that about?

Thursday evening, quite mundane, Andy got the new job (well his old job back), brilliant.....i am already planning to spend the rest of my days at coffee mornings and Mum's and Tots. Lets just hope they don't lay him off after 2 months like they did last year.

Friday i had a very productive day at work........not!
Awoke at 9.30am, the fooking sky man turned up shortly afterwards and proceeded to fanny around with new cables, drilling holes and making a right blinking mess for the next 2 1/2hrs.
All sky and sky+ boxes installed and in working order.
Eventually he dispersed, leaving cable ties all over the garden, wanker! i got cats out from under bed, calmed them down with wafer thin chicken, got ready and sped to work arriving at 12.20pm...........oops!

Had my lunch, as that's not taking the piss, chatted to Andy on the phone, then left at 3pm to fetch my parents from the station who's arrived back from the Isle of man.
Poor Mum was ever so upset about Maurice, fussed around her a bit, quick coffee at the bungalow, home, sorted stuff there, got changed and fetched fish and chips x 4 and took them back to the bungalow at 6pm.
Showed Mum scan pic which cheered her up a bit, after tea me and Ruth nicked off to the showcase to watch the Guardian...........(v.good, culmination of An officer and a gentleman, a smidgen of the Titanic thrown in with an Armageddon ending).......anyhew i cried it was a weepy!
Took Ruth's car home and i drove to spoons, spent a pleasant hour in spoons having a couple of J20's, chatted to Micky Foxall and Phil Carter, then bumped into Kim Palmer (blast from the past), who'd just had her 2nd daughter.
Took Ruth home, watched a bit of Catherine Tate, read a while and fell into bed at 2am.

Saturday was having a mammoth lie in when AP phoned at 11am, fookoff I'm resting. Nipped to Next to take back some too long in the leg combats, swapped for a pair of jeans and a jumper that won't show my midriff, took Andy to rugby club car park, home and bathed, wash on, cats in, packed, breakfast ya di ya!
Felt real bad for not swimming...........no time as had to fetch Andy from Huddersfield Rugby Union at 4.30pm.
Made good time, but was tootling along when i realised i'd missed Jcn 23 and was at Saddleworth........oops!

Did a u turn and back on the M62 Eastbound doing a steady 107..that's safe, but was only 10 minutes late......picked up tired red faced boyfriend and sped over the tops (while answering the phone to Sarah, Nicola and txting Spug back), arriving in Buxton at 5.45pm..........it was chucking it down as usual.

Had a lovely stay as always, chill city............gave the kiddies some toys, played with them till 7.30pm, then just ligged about, had a nice meal of bruschetta, followed by beef bourguignon with chocolate torte to finish, sat on the sofa fit to burst.........ooh i had a glass of red wine and was disappointed a didn't feel pissed.
Andy had water all night, told you he'd be better having the baby, he's not bothered about drinking.
The 1st time I've fallen pregnant i was jealous of Chris smoking.
Rhian and Chris were giving us baby stuff including their nursery rocking sliding chair and footstool, reight do! That'll save us £430.....like we'd have paid that anyhow!

We stayed up really late watching Team America, i laughed loads after 1st saying it was shit and telling Chris to turn it off, me and Andy went to bed after 1, leaving Chris rolling another.

Sunday we were awake to little voices outside the bedroom door "waiting" for us to get up, finally polled down at 10am, coffees, the Xfactor, lots of shrieking and running around, (the kids not us).
Then had a Stirling roast Sunday dinner of pork with all the trimmings and cream buns........( i wouldn't normally eat this much, but I'm with child).

Andy had 2nds, he should be pregnant i told you, finally set off home mid afternoon, Andy driving, me snoozing, i was so tired, there's nowt like your own bed.
Home at 4ish, was fooking pooped.........put the washer on, fed amaciated cats, jumped in the tub, then napped on sofa, spent the evening groggily watching shite t.v, eating cheese on toast, with the fire on until i retired at 10pm, to read crap magaxines in my boudoir.

Today is okay as Mondays go, have new jeans on that i bought to grow in to, they're far too big.........note to self wear a belt tomorrow as i'm sure my work colleagues don't want to see my Bridget Jones pants.

scan

I don't know where to start.

Monday and Tuesday evening i did nothing, i went up to bed early on Tuesday night as we'd to be up early yesterday, i needed have bothered......Andy came up 2 hours later stomping about like a baby elephant and waking me for nookie...........wtf?

The sky man was meant to call in-between the hours of 8&9 to give us an ETA, noone rang so i txt Steven to say that we'd probably be back from the hospital before they showed up and there was no need to come and sit at mine and wait for him.

Andy showered early doors i couldn't be assed as we were up late, so quick coffees and my compulsory pint of water, drove to Bronte towers, parked up and we were 10 minutes early, we were seen by a trainee lad who was lovely. So the scan?? oh my god, i couldn't believe my eyes, how clear this little baby was? it was amazing......tiny little thing jumping around, you can tell who it's Dad is, it went all coy when the photos were being taken, so we've a side view and one of the back of it's head and it's little spine...........Ahhh! oh my god, it's hard to believe this little thing is growing inside of me!!!

Andy was gobsmacked, he was craning his neck to get a better look at the monitor, utterly speechless. It was all over in 10 minutes, Dr.Davies was 5 days out so our new EDD is the 21st April, i suppose it'll come out when it wants to. Off we toddled with our scan piccys, Andy's telling me certain races aren't allowed to get scan pictures as they get expert opinions and kill their daughters..........okay then!

Home for 10.15am and unbeknown to us the fooking sky man had been and gone, so we had a full cooked breakfast, then waited until 3pm (watching the cricket) for him to show up, Andy went to the Gym and i had a nap, sky rang to re-book their engineer to come out again on Friday (more time off work), quick bath, tescos for more trashy mags, then Andy re-appeared, i wondered what was up as he was meant to be picking up Waitey and Blacky for bowls, he came to tell me ACL have phoned and they have some work on days, he's got to go see a bloke today about it (yippee yippee yippee, if he gets it.. it's double what he earns now and i won't have to go back to work after the baby's born)...... Ruth came up to look at the scan photo, Tina txt to see how the scan had gone, then Matt phoned to tell me about his house move.
After all this activity i sat down to a chicken bhuna, naan, pilau rice and ice-cream , oh and a chocolate mini roll. Read trashy mags, balled my eyes out at My heart belongs to Daddy on BBC2, Andy came after bowls to get scan photo to show his Mum.
Up the apples and pears at 10.45pm....pooped!

Today's not a good day, Uncle Mo passed away this morning, our thoughts and prayers go out to Hayley, Rachel and Auntie Gill..........Life can be so unfair!

Dentist, dining, Departed and other stuff

Ooh it's been a while, i'll try not to drone on.

Wednesday, Steven never showed up for his hair cutting, so i did nowt, read mags, ya di ya!

Thursday, something very similar, kept my head down at work and was all sweetness and light as i needed to take 1/2 day Friday.
AP and i did jack shit at night, resisted the temptation to bring new pine drawers home so we wouldn't have to put them up. Early to bed, early to rise.

Friday, the start of the weekend, yippee! bring it on, where's my glittery top and spangley shoes?
Left work at lunchtime and shlecked over the moors to Wilmslow, Chris patched up my back tooth (putting any more serious work on the back burner for when i am able to have x-rays), free scale and polish, then he signed off for the day, so we toddled off to a nice country pub and had a pie, a pint and a good old chin wag! Chris rocks!

Home for 4.15pm, got a wriggle on, let cats in and out, bathed, made myself looked 1/2 decent........collected Andy, then Ruth and Mark, we went to the Oracle for gourmet burger and chips, they all had pints to wash theirs down, i opted for a soft beverage, being designated driver etc!
Didn't stay too late, it wasn't overly busy, so we settled our bill and were back in Clecksville for 7.15pm, quick pint and a game of pool in the Commical, left R&M meeting some other party people, we shuffled off home to don our p.j's, turn the fire up and watch DVD's while eating cake and ice-cream.
Bed at 11pm, leaving Andy switching everything off!

Lovely Saturday.....early morning snuggles, coffee and tea in bed, we watched princess Nicky, then i put the washer on, changed into swimming cossie, dropped Andy home to get ready for rugby, then hit the pool.
Was a tad worried when i arrived, as i was earlier than usual, there were only a few randoms in, a bloke who looked like he'd had open heart surgery, three folk doing doggy paddle with blue floats attached to their backs, one girl having a swimming lesson and some old people, was sure i'd gatecrashed some pals club, but just got in and swam up and down hoping noone would ask me to leave. I later checked, it was only length swimming so i was in the clear.

Out, dried, home, bathed and grilled breakfast all before midday! look at me go!
Did a couple more wash loads, bedding etc, was ligged on the sofa, reading the bible (Take a break), when Marlene came visiting with vanilla slices......hooray!
We chatted an hour, then i blitzed all clothes drawers/dressing table drawers in the bedroom and bagged up charity stuff and things for the rubbish! I've thrown more rubbish out in the last 2 months than i have in the last 17yrs and 3 house moves.

I love my Saturdays, but they're over too quick, i could have done with another couple of hours slobbing but it was time to fetch Andy from the rugby. Called in G&D's, have noticed she talks to my stomach now and not my face, we wolfed a fish butty down each, then to the showcase for pop, revels, wine gums and The Departed............ace! reight do!
Home late late, bed for me and my magazine, sky sports and switching off all things electrical for AP!


Sunday, WTF? alarm woke us up in the middle of the night (9am), it was a flurry of morning coffees, showers, shaving (Andy not me), hair straightening (me not Andy), best togs and we were the last to the church, sat in the back pew, behind 19 other members of our family, for Marlo and Jim's ruby wedding celebration.
After 1hr, and me only knowing one hymn, the novelty had worn off, i was tired and hungry, stifling giggles at boyf doing Pavarotti impressions, praise the lord (literally) it was all over and we headed for the Priestley rooms for a finger buffet, poor Andy got interrogated by 15 Aunts, i sat and nodded at all the folk congratulating us, who i hadn't seen since the 90's.
Was bombarded by the Richardson's with news of their daughters whereabouts and well being! Struth get me out of here. Chistopher Garforth was, oh don't get me started.
Most of us ended up in Drub club (Andy drinking Stella and playing snooker with my brothers, would that be why he's blobbed work today?).
My mad Grandma was there, wearing all Auntie Edith's best clothes, she'd actually laid out on the bed for herself, but Grandma was up 1st and thought they'd suit her, she also had Tena ladies in her shoes thinking they were insoles (how is she supposed to know?).

the bar shut, all Aunties, Uncles went off home, me, my siblings and partners went to Gomersal Cricket club for one, i then dropped Andy at the Rose and Crown to meet Deano, Blacky and Waitey ( i know he's allowed a life etc, but what he cannot do is get mullered with the singletons, shirk work on a Monday morning and lose a days pay when we are with child, as we'll be living on a shoe string as it is! ) lecture over!

I went back to bed for an hour, got up after tea, p.j's, pie and chips, fire on full, laked wi cats and to bed at midnight to read trashy novel, all quite nice.

Monday fooking morning, i hate them, had to get up early to take Marlene and Jim to the the Station they're off to the Isle of Man for a trip down memory lane, bless em!

So that's my news, all lager free, party free, but full and varied all the same, i hope you'll agree! ooh that rhymed!
Off to fetch David some Kenyan shillings now, only 2 days of him this week, as Weds i'm having my scan then Thursday he's going fishing.......whoppee do!

Sky's the limit

I have the least amount of news ever and I'm still blogging, what's that all about?

It's either this or work, I'm secretly on strike as David is being an ass.

It's Wednesday, when it should be Friday already, how the weeks drag and the weekends fly? how unjust?

Monday, the first night in ages i just took it easy and chilled, Matt phoned, then i had to go and watch the final episode of Life begins, it was tearful!!! I phoned Matt back at 10pm and we carried onto chatting till 11.20pm, till he went to get his tea of mince!!??!
Up to bed where i read "Love it" or "Pick me up" or some equally trashy mag, i treat myself out of my social and get them every week.

Tuesday, it was horrible at work....when it's good, it's very very good, but when it's bad it horrid! Couldn't wait for the day to end, breathed a howge sigh of relief once home, plonked on the sofa, having a nice piece of fish, with winter veg. God i sound like a pensioner now!!
Andy came up, i finally succumbed and let him have sky sports, so we've the technical support man coming next week to fit us Sky+ multiroom, whatever that means? ooh boys!
He was punching the air going "yesss"..very bizarre!

Had a lovely night watching the racing channel, then Britain's youngest Mums, i particularly liked the bit with the 14yr old in labour, lying on the floor screaming with her muff out........nice!

Today i have no news, work is dire, roll on Christmas.....been emailing Hells, she is one barmy mother fucker, planning a bike ride from Lands end to John o'groats, then she's off to Australia soon.......selfish, me and AP were planning on letting her there at the birth, then she could lick them midwives into shape.
Excuse the pun!

This evening, Steven is calling up for his haircutting, there's nothing on t.v anymore, no Lost, life begins, DHW's it's all rubbish, i'll have to start watching rugby union or women's darts.......not!
Not sure about the weekends plans, i do know I'm off to Wilmslow Friday afternoon to see Chris, then Sunday morning my parents are celebrating their ruby wedding in church.
It's a good job my partying days are over, can you imagaine having to get up at 9am on a Sunday after a night out on the lash...........sooo not funny!!!

Goody Two Shoes

"Don't drink, don't smoke, what do you do?"
Adam Ant once sang it, you'll be too young to remember that!

What do i do though?, not very much i must admit.

The run down of my weekend......... don't get excited, you'd hardly recognise the new Amish me!

Friday evening i ran home (down the hard shoulder of the M62 past all the cars), put my tint on, then Ruth came for a good old gas, i answered the door in my knickers and cropped top, mad hair sticking all over the shop...........it's always a look!

Ruth had 2 mugs of tea, read the papers at the table while i was ironing 2 weeks worth of crumpled clothes as we chatted.

Off she went on her merry way for a Chinese, i washed off tint, emptied my wardrobe, took out everything that's too tight/short and put in storage (suitcase under the bed), sided ironing, bathed, had some stew.
Was laid on the chaise longue looking seductive when AP turned up at 10pm after the rugby.
Well ok, sofa in my jimmies, looking fooking worn out.
Watched Charlotte Church, i went up to bed at 11pm, leaving Andy "to switch everything off".

1 hr later, he came up, i asked him if everything was off? yep!
Have you turned the fire off?
"oh no, i'll go do it now".

So Saturday morning, I'm going to make coffees and he's left the kitchen light on and 3 living room lamps, including the fire, he must have though switching everything off.............meant.....the T.V.

He went to rugby, the sport not the place ( i changed into cossie, with clothes over the top), nipped in Tescos, then up to Next to get a new quilt cover, called in Mums for a wee and a coffee, then to the pool........only managed to swim for 40 mins as was starving. Saw Andy's mate Russ with his kids, was v.shown up, there's some thing about people you know seeing you in your swimwear. (apart from if you go right under at Brid).


Home, bath, then had a grilled breakfast.

Dad and Martyn turned up, dismantled the spare bed, loaded it up and gave me my long en.
I did 2 wash loads, vacced the house from top to bottom, (god I'm boring myself typing this, how bored are you lot reading it?).
Marlo came visiting, with her fags in me living room, after that i spruced up spare room, washed/dried new quilt and donned on our bed, by this time it was 6.30pm, where do the days go?

Fetched Andy at 7pm, called in G&D's and had a quick chat about pregnancy, then me and the boy spent our Saturday evening in our leeisure wear, watching Jackass the movie, eating hotdogs, chips and Viennese swirls................jealous? bet yar!
I went to bed at 11pm again and left Andy turning off EVERYTHING this time, having explained what this meant.
As i was climbing the stairs, i heard him saying "what are we going to watch cats?".
Oh dear!


Sunday, we are so loving the new quilt.
Tried to have a lie-in, can't sleep past 10am when you've not been out, rubbish!
Got up, had a full cooked breakfast like Rosanne and Dan. He went home for his skysports fix, while i mowed the lawn like a white slave, back to Tescos for Bisto, ice-cream and the Sunday papers.
Put the lamb joint in and prepared all the veg.
Andy came back at 2pm, Ruth and Mark showed up at 4pm, bearing chocolate trifle and flapjack. come in.. come in!

So the 4 of us ate like kings, lamb, yorkshires, sprouts, pigs in blankets, cauli, broccoli, carrots, mash and roast potatos, with gravy.
I honestly could have curled up on the rug and gone to sleep.
Ruth and mark washed up, how good are they?
After pudding, we ligged about in a state contentment, R&M went to the showcase, we sat and sighed a while.

Andy went home, leaving me to watch birth night live, which scared the fooking life out of me.
Up to bed (the new quilt was drawing me) at 10pm. :o)

It's official i'm the most boring person you know, the thing is i can't remember ever being so happy, clean house, p.j's, good food, boyf, baby on the way.

Makes me wonder what i was doing all those years, getting drunk in those watering hole places.
Wonder how many hours i've wasted lying in bed with hang-over? when i could have been up, cleaning and thinking i'm Duncan Goodhew at the baths.
Let's not even go there!

No news is good news

I said i'd blog later in the week when i'd cheered up.
I have cheered up marginally, but am not chipper due to the following happening.

Wednesday, while Andy was bowling i was washing place mats and bath sheets, setting up the new DVD player (on my own, how smug was i when it worked 1st time?), unboxing some posh serving platters on gold stands (i'd hoisted from work) washing them up and making room for them in the corner cupboard.

Also peeling one ton of winter veg for a good old fashioned Yorkshire stew and stewing the steak for 3 hrs, this is all after i'd had the hairs from my top lip and eyebrows ripped out with hot wax and my eyes dyed..........or something!

MJW phoned from Leatherhead, he'd received his birthday card with enclosed baby news, bless him, we chatted a while, he's very content and loving London life and his 10 minute walk to work.

So 9pm, i finally got my tea and ate it at the table, such glee! 10.30pm, i was in bed proper pooped, a women's work is never done.......ya di ya!

Thursday woke up in a belting mood........today is a good day... blah blah!
Got to work and vacced the entire offices, made colleagues hot beverages to stares of sheer happiness (she's back, gone is the hormonal grumpy witch we've been working with the last 8 weeks!), brushed my teeth after my cereal and out came 1/2 of my back tooth, fuckety fook, txt Chris and phoned his receptionist to make an appointment for Fri 13th..how apt!
Nipped out in my lunch hour, treat myself to some DVD's, then Clintons for M&D a Ruby wedding card and Mum a 60th card...blimey.
Called in Boots for loose powder and B&Q on the way back to the office for turps and blue paint.

The afternoon flew, was stuck on the M62 for an eternity, needed to get off at the showcase and call in Mother's for a wee, would never have made it home, happy families at the bungalow, Mother ignoring me as the weakest link was on.......nice, middle brother was there, i was having to be nice as he's buying my spare bed off me on Saturday, Dad in the bath and Steven pissed in bed.......stayed approx 4 mins and left hastily.
Home to baby Maisie with sticky green goo in the corner of her eyes, bathed them with cotton wool, then kept her in..........to her delight...not!

Took 10 ton bin to main road, full of crap from my cupboards, old DVD player etc.
Side all washing from spare room, put light under stew and had planned a nice relaxing evening for me and Andy as the last few nights he's been round, I've been in a strop or have set him on doing errands.
The last thing i want is him getting sick of me and running off with a black man.

So we're watching the end of Tuesday's film quite happy, he was telling me for the 2nd time about cheeky Bastard James turning up at the club on Wednesday night.
The phone rang and it was one of my oldest china's with horrible sad news, it's just puts everything in perspective, they say that everyone knows someone who is suffering from the big C, unfortunately that statistic is alarmingly correct.
We watched the rest of the film in glum silence, with Andy saying every now and again "that's not what you want to hear is it?".


Up to bed early, hoping today would be a better day.
Awoke to random texts.
Dean "has Andy purchased a suitable jumper now he's going to be a Father?".
Nic "what size t.shirt do i need for the hen night?"........fat with bump size.
Sarah "is the baby bump the size of a crown green bowl yet?".

What it is to be popular.

So it's the weekend, Friday night is pending.
My plans? dying my roots, howge pile of ironing, mile swim, dismantle spare bed, rid cupboards of more drek, give boyfriend blowjob, general ablutions, then R&M to dinner on Sunday.

How times are a changing!!!!

Grouch

I don't like being at work, it's poo.
I can't leave till the end of January at the earliest.........that's no good! still if i break it down week by week, it'll fly............like we've something planned every weekend in October, (so that should go quickly) it's only 12 weeks till Christmas........oh I'm not convinced, every day here seems like a week.
I suppose i should stick it out for all the free Xmas goodies. (not that i have a choice anyway).
Andy wants to go away again this year, I'm wondering about Lille Christmas market? get loads of duty free perfume while we're there??!!

I'd kind of put Christmas on the back burner, with baby on the way, Andy moving in and all that jazz. Truth is i'd not even thought about it, I'm usually quite organised......not going overboard this year, they'll be no party at mine (I'm not watching people booze and enjoy themselves in my living room, hahhhaa scrooge or what?). Just peace and tranquillity, I'm only buying for kiddies and family too, need to save my pennies for the future.

So nothing new has happened this week, Monday evening Paul let me home at 4.30pm, so i was checking my eyelids for holes on the sofa at 7pm, Andy came up to get rid of all algae on the path with special cleaner, he's a good egg.
I watched life begins, then celebrity wife swap and thanked my lucky stars I'm not living with John fooking McCririck, the fat lazy bastard.

Tuesday, made it through the day..making lists and looking int'Argos catalogue, was particularly enamoured by the baby monitors with a t.v screen attached...how cool? Also looking on the Ikea and Next websites, this virtual shopping in your mind is really cheap you know.

Tuesday evening, watched Life of David Gale on DVD with the boy, while mentally cleaning out more cupboards in my head (Whitter would be so proud), house is looking very cosy, now rid of excess tat, cats are loving new dining table, Luther sleeps on it, which is equally hygienic and not funny! much! anyhow half way through the fooking film, the DVD player packed in, this is all we need, just shelled out for a new table and chairs and a baby on the way.
I had a hissy fit like a 14yr old, Andy's saying "don't worry just buy another it's not the end of the world", it's me and electrical items, i hate them and the feelings mutual.

Later i'd calmed down and suggested we invite both sets of parents up for a meal, Andy said no as his Dad talks shite, poor Dave, i told him we'll have to have them up at Christmas as his Mum will want to know where he's living and what kind of home their Grandchild will have........he wasn't budging!

Wednesday that'd be today, woke up still mega stressed, i seem to have 1 million jobs to do and don't like being unorganised, today's plans are buy new DVD/Video combi player at lunch, am at the beauticians at 6.30pm (have sacked off Nicola and am trying a new venue), tonight i'd planned to stew some steak and prepare veg for some winter scram, then of course tackle setting up the new fooking recorder.
Ruth wanted to go see world trade, but i'll have to save treats like that for a weekend instead of going to the boozer.

Andy had just txt, we decided last night that taking a couple of days off to start the nursery and buy some baby stuff might be in order. so he's taken 3 days off at the end of the month, is he on glue, people will think we're mental, it's far too early, I've told him to cancel them. I'm getting worked up over silly stuff, stressing unnecessarily!
Truth is, i've all the time in the world..........to do little jobs and prepare, as i never go out!

Deep breaths!

I'm going to sign off now, i've turned into Hyacinth Bouquet.
I'll blog later in the week, when i've calmed down.
Hopefully!

Whoppee Do!

It's Yom Kippur and we are without the hierarchy.

Steady away today then i reckon, don't want to overdo it in my fragile state....guffaw guffaw!

What have i been up to?

Well Wednesday Mum came up visiting, waking me from my fave position ligged on the sofa, fast asleep, red faced with the fire on full...........attire? which ever p.j's are clean at that moment in time.
There was no line dancing and she was at a loose end, so she was round mine with her fags, stinking out my abode............yak........cough.....splutter!
Gave her the duty free Andy had bought her, (she loves him more than me) i had shepherds pie, off she toddled to Uncle Mo's and i had an early night!

Thursday i'd got it in my head, the best thing to do on my way home from work would be to call in Ikea and get some new table and chairs,because pine furniture isn't heavy for a pregnant lady to carry......home at 6.30pm, unpacked all furniture outside and threw away packaging, took coffee table apart and put in shed, took footstools upstairs, sided all food shopping, was in bath when Andy arrived, with all the furniture strewn all over living room for him to make a start on after he'd had a rather vigorous workout at the gym and was expecting a night ligged on the sofa................poor boy! tee hee!

He made a start (without reading any instructions), luckily Mark and Ruth showed up to collect their duty-free. Mark helped and it was all up and looking spiffing by 9.30pm.
Had some nice quiche and salad for tea, watched Extras (ooh i had a dream last night that me and Ricky Gervais were washing up...random). Andy staggered off home, i went to bed to read.

Friday, my fooking back was crippled, been up twice in the night to the loo, walking like Mrs.Overall......text Leigh and blobbed work.
Slept till mid morning, up to texts from Rach and Tina along with the congratulations one's from Spug and Beth the day before, had a nice day, hobbling around, charity shop to take unwanted baby rocker and floor cushions, Ikea to swap split chair slat, Next to buy bigger girl trousers, tops, babygros and bibs, Tescos for fruit and milk, homeward bound, had a spot of lunch, pottered all afternoon, threw a binliner of drek away from kitchen cupboards.
Then got ready and fetched Andy at 5.30pm, we headed for the bright lights of Leeds and to the Oracle for gourmet burger and chips, garlic bread and non alcoholic cocktails (we're so wild), food was well nice, was a tad jealous of the Friday night drunken party revellers, but never mind, was home at 7.15pm with nice boyfriend, watching flightplan DVD in my p.j's eating ice lollies..........don't ask!

Saturday....I'm so loving my Saturdays lately, hang-over free active girl. Was at the pool early doors, swam for an hour, stared agog and some pregnant bocker, in a bikini, wearing all her wealth, covered in tattoos, chewing gum, just sat in the shallow end. Cripes!
Home, bath and grilled breakfast, then spent all afternoon, cleaning out cupboards, putting stuff to the charity, moved all stuff from under spare bed, dragged all photo albums into living room, was fooked! but all this nesting makes me feel brilliant.

Phoned Chris and Rhian with my news to lots of shrieking, Chris wanted to know if he could txt his Mum, they've invited us over for a meal, which will be nice.
Had a light snack, got cats in, (a spider had attacked Meg and she was crying), new neighbours were moving in next door, hope they're not noisy!!!

Txt Matt as he said he was in Cleck Saturday, he didn't get it so i presumed he wasn't and set off to the club at 7pm, arrived to everyone congratulating me........words out then!
I was well popular, getting kisses and pats on the tummy from Hemmy, Granty, Katy, Dave Turton, Russ, Waitey..could have stayed there all night basking in the glory. But had a quick orange, chatted to KF and off we toddled to Spoons, where i had a surprisingly really good night, just sat nattering with Caroline, Warren, John, Clare and Matt (who'd not checked his phone till 2hrs after my txt), never mind, was highly amused that he was drinking bottles of 7.5% Perry........Spug, Tina, Beth and Vicky all showed up for one, so had a nice chat, not seen them since Rach's birthday 8 weeks ago.

We left with John and Clare and headed for pizza base at 10.15pm, dropped them home, had a few slices and we were both tucked up in bed before midnight.

Another nice day yesterday, up mid morning, sleepy Sabbath just pottering, took Andy for his car after breakfast, did a couple of wash loads, stripped bed, cleaned the bathroom, then fell asleep on the sofa for 2 hours awaking at 5.20pm, what the fook?
Went to see Mum for an hour, Nicola phoned double checking about hen do, bless........ she's the only person in Cleck who didn't know i was pregnant, told her i was going to drive home, so didn't need a hotel, she's getting me a bigger t.shirt to compensate my bump, to go with the devils horns and trident, I'm going to look a right bonny bugger!!!!!!

Chatted to Marlo who is full of cold again, she was saying things like nobody's txt me to wish me Happy Grandma (I'm sure she's on glue, she doesn't even own a mobile). Ruth arrived returning jigsaws, we stayed till 8pm, then went to our respective abodes.
Last night, had a bite to eat and watched the Exorcism of Emily rose on DVD which is a load of rubbish.

That's the events of my last 5 days, longwinded but decidedly more chipper i might hasten to add!!!