Where have i been?

I don't know what happened, i think maybe I've been temporarily on strike from blogging! not really, but i have been v.busy.

Quick run down of the last week.

Monday: i went to Nicholas's for waxing and tinting, then vegged for the evening.

Tuesday: was so wild i can't remember what i did, it was either rock climbing (one handed)or being a dominatrix (spanking grown business men wearing nappies).

Wednesday: saw AP before he bowled, he was looking mighty fine in Jim's tank top, had a pizza and i packed for Sarah's.

Thursday: I blagged Leigh to let me leave early, home, showered, loaded car, said au revoir to my cats, picked up AP and we headed for the AI(M), i drove the 1st half, I'm a much better driver.........so for the last 2 hours of the journey i spent shrieking "slow down", "are you trying to kill me?"the journey was quite uneventful, i think we had a wee at Kings Lynn and by 10.30pm we'd arrived at the Hellsworths, Sarah had just demolished a family size bag of doritos and a tray of dips, she offered us hot and cold beverages and we watched Grease the movie and yabbered away until the early hours.
Bed at 2am, my last words, don't wake me before 11am.
I clambered into Sarah's single bed, Andy was on the double airbed on the floor and Sarah was in the spare room.

Friday: guess who need a wee at 8am, oh me! got in with Andy, but no sleep on the menu!
9ish we decided to get up, Sarah came down at 10 and me and her started tackling a full English breakfast like a pair of novices, it was pathetic, i blame the slowest grill in the world and Sar refusing to chuck everything in the frying pan as i suggested.
By 11am, we sat down to a jocker feast, then after the washing up was done, we dressed and set off to Potter Heigham. Cool, we hired a boat and went punting down the river, AP drove as he is a man, the novelty wore off and he let me drive back.
Sarah was ligged on the deck trying to get a tan.
Moored the boat when our time was up, scrambled to the shore then had a pop in the pub, we set off from the haunted carpark and drove back into Yarmouth, where we parked the car and walked on the front, before spending 2 hours playing crazy golf (v. funny as Mr. competitive lost to Sarah by one point, he added the scores up again in case i'd made a rick).
Back to the car, we called at Tesco's for tea stuff, home and feasted on chicken (2 whole, i kid you not Andy didn't think we'd have enough with 1 chicken for 3 people). potatoes, salad and French bread, i covered mine in coleslaw so it wouldn't be too healthy.
Ligged around after tea, listening to tales from Dan about his suicide watch, watching BB, taking it in turns to shower, then SS arrived and off we toddled to the local yokel pub, Peggartys!!!!! got it was full of pissheads, it made Cleck look like a monastery!
We played doubles at pool (how twee), bought 4 rounds and i sat for the evening being the butt of everyone's jokes, what it is to be popular! Every young wipper snapper in the vicinity was arseholed this rather heavily breasted young exhibitionist was lobbing her jugs out and her mate was sucking on her nipple to much cheering from a big group of boys, it was SO classy!
Off we trot at 1am, Sarah and Simon stayed downstairs (she Sooo loves him), we went to our separate beds to sleep.

Sunday: was awoken by the 3rd world war air raid warnings.........it was SO loud, turned out to be a flood warning going off 4 times at 8.30am.
We managed to go back to sleep, i heard Andy nip to the loo, then get this....he gets back under his quilt and i heard him say (out loud), "just 5 more minutes and i'll wake Karen", WTF??? it was 11.30am, when we got up.........yippee! me and Sar managed to conquer breakfast in 1/2hr.......result!
Packed up the car as we'd decided to drive through the night instead of wasting 1/2 of Sunday on the A17.
Parked the car on the seafront again and we mosied around town, killing time in joke shops, buying rock, then sheltered in the amusements from that rain, oh my...........they needed the flood warnings! 3.30pm, we went to see Snakes on a plane at the Hollywood cinema........reight do,sweets, popcorn all the way! cheesy movie but better than you expect, once the movie was over we headed for Harry Ramsdens, 1 mile up the seafront, still we worked up a good appetite, fish, chips, mushy peas, tea, bread & butter 3 times, paid for by Mr. Porrait.........reight do!
Walked back to the car, dropped Sarah back in Gorlston, where she had a night of DVD's and diesel planned and we headed up'north, chatted all the way, very weary from the sea air and kipping in strange beds, swapped again at the 1/2 way services, the rain was horrid and we had a couple of hairy moments, but made it home safe and sound for 11.45pm.

Was so glad to see my feline family, unpacked the car, bath and p.j's and watched t.v till the 1.30am, slept like the dead for 12hrs.

Sunday i snook to Tescos, in my scruffs with no make-up and bumped straight into Gill and Dave, then Spug and Eileen, doh!
Had a very lazy Sunday, which consisted of Sunday lunch, washing, tidying,chatting to Helen on the phone, feeling bad for Maisie who had been out for 10hrs on Friday (this is why i need people to stay at my house, she is ferel and wants to come in when she's ready). Anyhow Mum is looking after them when i go to Helen's in 2 weeks............... Not that she was arsed once she's had some tuna and was layed in front of the fire. Watched an evening of the BB finals, read the papers, made Mondays salad and went to bed at 11.30pm, to read and was sparko!!!!!!!

Monday: was a nice day, just me, David and Paul as Leigh is in St.Annes!!! Wtf? steady away, went to town at lunch and got Andy some smellies and a Thorntons chocolate monkey............spoilt in know!
Back to routine last night, ace! had a chicken dinner, Andy came up, gave him his presents, Mum came up with his card and caught him in his boxers (he was trying on new jeans, i don't know how your mind works!!??) we all played twister then Mum went to Auntie Gills, Andy left late, i shuffled to bed like an old lady at 10.30pm to read new book Jill Mansell...........making your mind up..v.good.

Tuesday today, it's his lordships birthday.......for the next 8 months i am no longer a decade older than him, to celebrate we have a table booked at the Woodlands £40 a head v. posh restaurant, thank-you very much! it's only cash, you can't take it with you.