Jack fell down and broke his crown

I'm going to keep this brief as not much has happened.

We went to the flicks on Friday night, after both having a disco kip (told you school night drinking was evil..some of the Thursday night party revellers even blobbed work on Friday), went to see Pirates of the Caribbean 2 at the showcase, it wasn't as good as the 1st one and was on a hell of a long time.

Dropped Andy home, i watched late night t.v and had some wine in my pyjamas with my cats round my feet...reight do!

Saturday i rose late and utilised my time as follows.... put my tint on my hair, made 2 sausage and bacon pies (Gordon Ramsey recipies 9th Aug), while watching BB eviction repeats through the hatch, door wide open for cats to play out.

Had a shower, then took Marlo and Jim a pie, ended up staying there for tea, then rushed home at 5.30pm to get ready for the engagement BBQ, sat on the sofa for 2hrs, till Andy phoned at 7.30 to say they'd only just finished cricket(they'd gone the full 100 overs) and was on his way home from Idle. He picked me up 8.15pm, we drove to Angela's and were the last to arrive out of maybe 40 or so pissed and stoned guests, what a car crash.
Andy was very proud of the fact that he'd had his beer in the freezer all day and it wa reight cold, that'd be "frozen" then.........Carling ice pop anyone?
I'd taken 8 ciders from the fridge, just to use them up..........past experiences of drinking cider? throwing bottles and arguing with AP wearing wet washing, you'd think i'd learn!

The party was complete mayhem, gave Katie her Champagne and chocolates, she was wearing a tiara/long white gloved combo affair!
Chris was mashed, Deano was dancing on his own, Matt looked rough as fook, Woz was mullered, i put my can down and he picked it up and started swigging from it, Guy and Carl were taking it in turned to cook burgers, Debbie was flitting round with trays of tequilla being the perfect hostess!
When she gets to you Karen........say NO!
Blacky was buttering me up to get a free pass to my works carpark,Waitey and co were firing Magners cider down at an alarming rate, Nic was asking me and Andy our middle names for the place settings for her and Carls wedding!
The garden was massive, someone called Weeble had done a sterling job of erecting the decking! note to self...........get yourself some mates named after 70's kids toys!!!
Lets cut to the chase, come midnight most people had fucked off,(including, one mullered Matthew who was insisting he take his left-over beer home with him) the stalwarts were inside dodging the rain, can't remember who was there, but Maria was being my bezzie mate, saying things like "you're lovely" and "i'd have thought you'd go out with somone louder than Andy"...Eh?
Maybe 20 odd folk left, now someone had broken the downstairs loo door (it had come off it's runners), so we're all trecking upstairs to take a leak, guess which twat fell down the entire staircase head first and rolled into the living room, much to the amusement of Mason, Blacky, Turner, Katie and every other fucker who was laughing at me!
Oh me.......... i was inconsolable, Andy had to take me home, so his dragging me by the hand, up the road, round the corner, pissing down with rain, every now and again, he gave me a crack round the back of the head for showing him up!
It wa'awful!

Next thing i know it Sunday, god i was dying! i'm gingerly asking what happened, he's laughing like a drain and saying "don't worry about it"... the cunt!
At least i don't have to see everyone for a fortnight, he left after some loving and making me get up to look for his sock, i slept off the shame, then did 2 wash loads, had some sausage pie, watched BBLB, then went back to bed, oh i didn't feel well..........do not let me drink, cider, tequilla and vodka in the same session ever again.
Sods law as soon as i dropped off, Andy phoned 8 times to see if i was going to the 20/20 cricket, NO..........i'm Poorly (and embaressed).
Slept till 7pm, then couldn't sleep last night......wonder why? watched Lost, BB, did my ironing and generally sulked! was still awake at 2.30am this morning, haven't had enough sleep........but being tired is much better than being hung-over!

You mark my words!