There was sick everywhere
Here we are again.
Don't know where the weekend went, i blinked and missed it i reckon!
Friday erm....?
Oh yeah, collected my mates at the strike of 8 and we met Tracey outside spoons, because she wasn't fucking going in on her own.
We got a table and sat round, Hayley, Spug, Tracey, Beth, Tina, Me, Danny and his Mum Lynn, then James arrived followed by Ruth and Mark.
Noone had much to say only Lynn (Danny i wish you'd have a spray tan, them beds aren't good for you, i've had a spray tan, i'll be brown in 3 hrs, why don't you have a spray tan).
Danny bought his mum a 2nd pint, to shrieks of "oh Danny i can't sup all that". She then asked me if she looked different as she's eaten loads of nuts and raisins that week.......erm NO!
Turnstiles, i don't want any fucking test tubes..........they make me lose my memory.
Station, chatted to Ian and his mate who had also fallen victim to Claire.....oh heck.
Then talked to James, well shouted over the speakers, we chatted about not being promiscuous and congratulated ourselves on being good wholesome people, i think!
Had some gum, then up t'regal...... i was having a right good time, flitting around like it was my own private party, chatted to lovely James at the bar about evil James, then talked to Ady Garland, then Ian and his friend, danced loads and had just a couple of drinks, no memory loss......how good am i? Turned round and all my mates had left me and gone to outbacks, cheers!
Begged Ian to come for a curry, he wasn't budging as he's told his wife he'd be home at 1am.
Got outside, James was there with Danny and Lynn (i wish you'd have a spray tan our Danny).
Begged James to come for curry, he was having none of it, so snook in sloppy joes it was quiet enough for me to dine in. Table for one..........Javved (the usual my love?) "yeah, can i have 2 poppodoms please and some chango mutney?".
Poked my head round the door to A2B taxi's, different bird (as in not the one i'd fused the lights on....phew) home safe and sound for 1.30am.
Saturday........Carwash, working at the car wash yeah! then Tescos......boo! fucking hate shopping! Meg helped to unpack bags, begging for boiled ham all the while.
leisurely got ready and was collected at 7.30pm by Katy and a taxi driver to take us to the sports club, Daddy Spug was asking where the other 6 dwarves were sleepy? ha ha ha!!!
Had 2 shandies, Ap was in the other bar with Grant, Woz (who was wearing a frightening yellow shirt), Matt W, and some other rugga bugga randoms.
Spug was falling asleep after her mid afternoon bottle of malibu, so taxied to spoons, only had 1 in there as Tina, Tracey and Beth were in the turnstiles, left just missing Lynn, Paul and some other blokes. Fozzy played our request that we never asked for, chatted to Katy mainly about Grants drug smuggling, had 2 beers in there then back round to spoons to check on the men.
Andy was MULLERED, he was stood "wi lads you know how it is" but turned round to check i was still there 146 times........i went to the loo and Tina sat in my place to confuse him.
Spug, Tina, Beth and Tracey went to the Station.......Katy and i went over to talk to the men in blue shirts and red ties.
Grant told Andy about me weeing in the bin.....I NEVER FUCKING PISSED IN THE BIN!
Yep he was mullered alright "sorry Karen, sorry". Knew he was worse for wear as he was trying to snog my face off and put his hand down my pants in the middle of weatherspoons at 10.30pm in front of all his mates. He also asked me what i'd done that day 6 times.
He'd only had 14 pints, decided he'd be better in A&E getting his stomach pumped, he then piped up Grant better come too coz he's had the same.
Made the decision to take him home instead of the regal, bumped into Neil Jackson.
Told Andy that i'd been seeing his brother a bit when he was in Oz, "oh it's all coming out now" he said as he affectionately pushed me into the road.
Got him home where he followed me round the house like a lost puppy, fuck off i'm having a wee.
Made him some orange juice, he then rearranged the fridge wanting to know where the runner beans were kept. Chatted about our Easter plans, he was shrieking "my job's fucking shit i hate it". poor boy....told him i was off to stay with Matt (no Andy he doesn't live in London anymore).
Upstairs he lay on the bed fully clothed, he looked a tad queezy, asked him if he was going to be sick......"no, erm YEAH" he meant it alright, sprayed the entire bathroom, walls, floor, his shirt."sorry Karen, sorry".
Gave him a glass of water and went to sleep in the spare room.
Well i don't want to sleep with sicky boy!!!!
Being the caring soul i am, went in to see him at 6am, 8am and 9.30am to check his willy wasn't affected by his mystery stomach bug.....nope it was fine thanks!
He looked divine leaving at 10.30am with sick down the front of his shirt and tie scrunched up in his pocket, told him he looked gorgeous, he muttered you don't look so bad yourself, realised he wasn't kidding as i checked my reflection, indeed i did look like the bride of frankinstein, last nights make-up etched to my face.
Fuck it !! went back to bed for a couple of hours, then did my usual Sunday shite, washing, vaccing, Walked round to Marlene and Jims for Sunday dinner.
Fetched Steven from the golf club, he was arseholed and tried to climb out of the car while in motion around the roundabout in Robbertown.
Then tried to show me a new elbow dance he'd just made up to the "show me the way to Amarillo".
Home, phoned Chris and ended up crying with laughter, Thirza had been trying to stall him, to stay a bit longer after her bedtime story and had piped up "Daddy? in the morning can we, Erm......erm...turn Mummy into a turnip?" barking, barking mad family, Rhian came on the phone and wanted to know if i was free 8th May............NEXT YEAR, for her 40th.???????
Anyhow going over to the Sugden mansion on Saturday to deliver their 4 chandaliers that have been in my kitchen since the 1st week in January.
Settled down with cats and watched The last dance with Richard Gere and Jennifer Lopez, which is quite frankly the shittest film i have ever seen in my entire life after Dead poets society and the Horse whisperer (haven't actually seen the latter but any film that involves whisering to a horse is bound to be bab).
Don't know where the weekend went, i blinked and missed it i reckon!
Friday erm....?
Oh yeah, collected my mates at the strike of 8 and we met Tracey outside spoons, because she wasn't fucking going in on her own.
We got a table and sat round, Hayley, Spug, Tracey, Beth, Tina, Me, Danny and his Mum Lynn, then James arrived followed by Ruth and Mark.
Noone had much to say only Lynn (Danny i wish you'd have a spray tan, them beds aren't good for you, i've had a spray tan, i'll be brown in 3 hrs, why don't you have a spray tan).
Danny bought his mum a 2nd pint, to shrieks of "oh Danny i can't sup all that". She then asked me if she looked different as she's eaten loads of nuts and raisins that week.......erm NO!
Turnstiles, i don't want any fucking test tubes..........they make me lose my memory.
Station, chatted to Ian and his mate who had also fallen victim to Claire.....oh heck.
Then talked to James, well shouted over the speakers, we chatted about not being promiscuous and congratulated ourselves on being good wholesome people, i think!
Had some gum, then up t'regal...... i was having a right good time, flitting around like it was my own private party, chatted to lovely James at the bar about evil James, then talked to Ady Garland, then Ian and his friend, danced loads and had just a couple of drinks, no memory loss......how good am i? Turned round and all my mates had left me and gone to outbacks, cheers!
Begged Ian to come for a curry, he wasn't budging as he's told his wife he'd be home at 1am.
Got outside, James was there with Danny and Lynn (i wish you'd have a spray tan our Danny).
Begged James to come for curry, he was having none of it, so snook in sloppy joes it was quiet enough for me to dine in. Table for one..........Javved (the usual my love?) "yeah, can i have 2 poppodoms please and some chango mutney?".
Poked my head round the door to A2B taxi's, different bird (as in not the one i'd fused the lights on....phew) home safe and sound for 1.30am.
Saturday........Carwash, working at the car wash yeah! then Tescos......boo! fucking hate shopping! Meg helped to unpack bags, begging for boiled ham all the while.
leisurely got ready and was collected at 7.30pm by Katy and a taxi driver to take us to the sports club, Daddy Spug was asking where the other 6 dwarves were sleepy? ha ha ha!!!
Had 2 shandies, Ap was in the other bar with Grant, Woz (who was wearing a frightening yellow shirt), Matt W, and some other rugga bugga randoms.
Spug was falling asleep after her mid afternoon bottle of malibu, so taxied to spoons, only had 1 in there as Tina, Tracey and Beth were in the turnstiles, left just missing Lynn, Paul and some other blokes. Fozzy played our request that we never asked for, chatted to Katy mainly about Grants drug smuggling, had 2 beers in there then back round to spoons to check on the men.
Andy was MULLERED, he was stood "wi lads you know how it is" but turned round to check i was still there 146 times........i went to the loo and Tina sat in my place to confuse him.
Spug, Tina, Beth and Tracey went to the Station.......Katy and i went over to talk to the men in blue shirts and red ties.
Grant told Andy about me weeing in the bin.....I NEVER FUCKING PISSED IN THE BIN!
Yep he was mullered alright "sorry Karen, sorry". Knew he was worse for wear as he was trying to snog my face off and put his hand down my pants in the middle of weatherspoons at 10.30pm in front of all his mates. He also asked me what i'd done that day 6 times.
He'd only had 14 pints, decided he'd be better in A&E getting his stomach pumped, he then piped up Grant better come too coz he's had the same.
Made the decision to take him home instead of the regal, bumped into Neil Jackson.
Told Andy that i'd been seeing his brother a bit when he was in Oz, "oh it's all coming out now" he said as he affectionately pushed me into the road.
Got him home where he followed me round the house like a lost puppy, fuck off i'm having a wee.
Made him some orange juice, he then rearranged the fridge wanting to know where the runner beans were kept. Chatted about our Easter plans, he was shrieking "my job's fucking shit i hate it". poor boy....told him i was off to stay with Matt (no Andy he doesn't live in London anymore).
Upstairs he lay on the bed fully clothed, he looked a tad queezy, asked him if he was going to be sick......"no, erm YEAH" he meant it alright, sprayed the entire bathroom, walls, floor, his shirt."sorry Karen, sorry".
Gave him a glass of water and went to sleep in the spare room.
Well i don't want to sleep with sicky boy!!!!
Being the caring soul i am, went in to see him at 6am, 8am and 9.30am to check his willy wasn't affected by his mystery stomach bug.....nope it was fine thanks!
He looked divine leaving at 10.30am with sick down the front of his shirt and tie scrunched up in his pocket, told him he looked gorgeous, he muttered you don't look so bad yourself, realised he wasn't kidding as i checked my reflection, indeed i did look like the bride of frankinstein, last nights make-up etched to my face.
Fuck it !! went back to bed for a couple of hours, then did my usual Sunday shite, washing, vaccing, Walked round to Marlene and Jims for Sunday dinner.
Fetched Steven from the golf club, he was arseholed and tried to climb out of the car while in motion around the roundabout in Robbertown.
Then tried to show me a new elbow dance he'd just made up to the "show me the way to Amarillo".
Home, phoned Chris and ended up crying with laughter, Thirza had been trying to stall him, to stay a bit longer after her bedtime story and had piped up "Daddy? in the morning can we, Erm......erm...turn Mummy into a turnip?" barking, barking mad family, Rhian came on the phone and wanted to know if i was free 8th May............NEXT YEAR, for her 40th.???????
Anyhow going over to the Sugden mansion on Saturday to deliver their 4 chandaliers that have been in my kitchen since the 1st week in January.
Settled down with cats and watched The last dance with Richard Gere and Jennifer Lopez, which is quite frankly the shittest film i have ever seen in my entire life after Dead poets society and the Horse whisperer (haven't actually seen the latter but any film that involves whisering to a horse is bound to be bab).
posted by Karen @ 9:37 AM
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