Blog you fuckers

Matt and Emma excluded, but it's all very well having your name in lights and not participating!

Bah humbug!

I'm having another productive day with the Jews, just made the biggest pile of bacon butties in the world, I'm having cereal (how else would i keep my slim physique), feck all has happened since yesterday, erm!

Let me think.........had a nice night last night, took me an hour to get home, that cunting M62, (going home Whitehall Road way tonight), Had lamb chops, sprouts, broccoli, carrots and jacket potato, set the smoke alarm off for added drama!

Watched Holby city, tided out the letter rack (threw away 14000 Next receipts), then tided all shoes in bottom of wardrobe, even parted with some old boots, flip flops and 2 pair of slippers!.............ooh i'm such a hoarder!

Then waxed my top lip, rubbish! didn't even work, it said on the packet, let the hair growth be at least 4mm, fuck off, that's like saying grow a full moustache before trying to rid yourself of any facial hair!

Phoned Suggs, who was smoking on the porch (note to self, do not phone Chris after 9pm, as he will be so stoned you cannot get any fooking sense out of him, but he will giggle like a girl for a good hour while telling you really unfunny stories).


Actually, i was still laughing about his 4 yr old daughter Thirza at the dinner table, when i went up to bed.

"Daddy? if I'm really lucky, when I'm a grown up, you can come and live with me in my house"
Then in a hushed tone..........
"and i will cook you sausages for your tea".

She then made it quite clear Olivia wasn't coming and her Mother was only allowed to visit!

Watched Mondays and Tuesday EE on tape and read for an hour in bed.

Like i said, just made breakfast, gonna wash up soon, David taking Elliott to court in a minute, honestly any normal Tom, Dick or Harry gets head butted on a Saturday night in a busy wine bar, they take it on the chin, not little Jew boys, he's pressing charges, "how dare that nasty man want to spoil my beautiful boat race"!!!