Pickled Liver
I have been top boozer this weekend! I give myself a pat on the back but I'm suffering today - not with hangover but a nice Marlo style barking cough and a sore throat. Think it has a lot to do with the 100+ Lambert and Butler Gold I've smoked! Oh dear!
Friday night began with my new girly haircut and waxed eyebrows. Nicola thought she'd pulled my whole eyebrow off at one point there was that much hair on the strip - classy bird!
I decided that 8.30 was too late to go out with the lasses from college so ventured accross the road at 3.30 to the malt shovel and began my speedy decent to drunken hell (i like it there - people are good looking and like fighting)!
Was joined in the Malt Shovel be my 2 good friends Zoe and Alan which made me want to stay out for the night and not have to go home and change my clothes, eat something, etc! Anyway 6 pints later I strolled (or wobbled) to the chip shop to squash my hunger and line my stomach for more beer.
Got home, quick wash, changed and slapped some make-up on then a taxi to The Bull's Head in Gomersal. Had to ask 5 people during the day if they knew where it was but found it eventually.
Lasses from college arrived drinking glasses of wine and bacardi & cokes. I stuck to pints of lager - didn't want to mix my drinks just yet. After my pint Gillian kindly bought me a bottle of bacardi breezer lime (Spug and Rachel love them!) and off to Batley we went.
Ventured into a new pub where they had lovely toilets (must be new for Batley) then to Legends, Boulevard and mucky X. Devoured test tube shots and bottles of Smirnoff Ice until I lost all the girls and decided to get a taxi home - Bargain at £16! Picked Mark up from his brothers house with the intention of taking him home for sex.
Didn't happen - climbed into bed naked telling him I was really horny whilst he took my make-up off as I was too pissed to do it. Then when he got into bed I was snoring away merrily - sorry baby!
Saturday felt a little rough but battled through the day with a little help from Ronald McDonald and some shopping for things I don't need and can't afford - oh well! Then it was Saturday night all of a sudden.
Went to the Pack Horse with Zoe and Alan where we were joined by Tracey and Coop, Tommo and Pete the Feet. Had a competition about who could growl like a rugby player and look hard - I won even with my new girly hair and eyebrows.
Ventured into town where we saw Karen and Co in the Turnstiles - apologised to our Karen for scratching her boots that I've borrowed but turns out it wasn't me that did it at all! It was Karen at someones wedding in 1999 - Long lasting boots are the best aren't they Karen! Hee hee!
Up to the Regal for some dancing where Tina told me going on 15 times that I looked gorgeous - got quite worrying after a while, bless her! Laughed at Marks appauling dancing as he was battered from drinking 9 pints of Export - silly man!
Went home for toast and bed - take aways are too expensive after spending nearly £200 in 2 days!
Yesterday cooked a Sunday dinner in Mark's parents new kitchen - it was lovely even if I do say so myself! Roast chicken, mashed potatoes, roast potatoes, carrots, peas and Yorkshire pudding! Yummy! (P.S. Don't forget Pancake day tomorrow!)
Met up with the Karen, Spug, Rach, Dean and the wufters in Spoons where I did polish off 2 bottles of wine and could have quite easily drunk another one it tasted that nice!
After singing, laughing and taking the mick out of Karen Horner and Danny Whitehouse (yes Mr.President) everyone went there own seperate ways home.
Although me and Mark did sit on the Market Stalls for a while chatting then reported an unmarked taxi to the police - good deed for the month! Then it was home to bed, or the sofa to sit and watch young Kylie Minogue nearly get her baps out as a teenage delinquent!
Up for work this morning feeling horrible but battling through!
So that was my weekend - you can all wake up now! xx
Friday night began with my new girly haircut and waxed eyebrows. Nicola thought she'd pulled my whole eyebrow off at one point there was that much hair on the strip - classy bird!
I decided that 8.30 was too late to go out with the lasses from college so ventured accross the road at 3.30 to the malt shovel and began my speedy decent to drunken hell (i like it there - people are good looking and like fighting)!
Was joined in the Malt Shovel be my 2 good friends Zoe and Alan which made me want to stay out for the night and not have to go home and change my clothes, eat something, etc! Anyway 6 pints later I strolled (or wobbled) to the chip shop to squash my hunger and line my stomach for more beer.
Got home, quick wash, changed and slapped some make-up on then a taxi to The Bull's Head in Gomersal. Had to ask 5 people during the day if they knew where it was but found it eventually.
Lasses from college arrived drinking glasses of wine and bacardi & cokes. I stuck to pints of lager - didn't want to mix my drinks just yet. After my pint Gillian kindly bought me a bottle of bacardi breezer lime (Spug and Rachel love them!) and off to Batley we went.
Ventured into a new pub where they had lovely toilets (must be new for Batley) then to Legends, Boulevard and mucky X. Devoured test tube shots and bottles of Smirnoff Ice until I lost all the girls and decided to get a taxi home - Bargain at £16! Picked Mark up from his brothers house with the intention of taking him home for sex.
Didn't happen - climbed into bed naked telling him I was really horny whilst he took my make-up off as I was too pissed to do it. Then when he got into bed I was snoring away merrily - sorry baby!
Saturday felt a little rough but battled through the day with a little help from Ronald McDonald and some shopping for things I don't need and can't afford - oh well! Then it was Saturday night all of a sudden.
Went to the Pack Horse with Zoe and Alan where we were joined by Tracey and Coop, Tommo and Pete the Feet. Had a competition about who could growl like a rugby player and look hard - I won even with my new girly hair and eyebrows.
Ventured into town where we saw Karen and Co in the Turnstiles - apologised to our Karen for scratching her boots that I've borrowed but turns out it wasn't me that did it at all! It was Karen at someones wedding in 1999 - Long lasting boots are the best aren't they Karen! Hee hee!
Up to the Regal for some dancing where Tina told me going on 15 times that I looked gorgeous - got quite worrying after a while, bless her! Laughed at Marks appauling dancing as he was battered from drinking 9 pints of Export - silly man!
Went home for toast and bed - take aways are too expensive after spending nearly £200 in 2 days!
Yesterday cooked a Sunday dinner in Mark's parents new kitchen - it was lovely even if I do say so myself! Roast chicken, mashed potatoes, roast potatoes, carrots, peas and Yorkshire pudding! Yummy! (P.S. Don't forget Pancake day tomorrow!)
Met up with the Karen, Spug, Rach, Dean and the wufters in Spoons where I did polish off 2 bottles of wine and could have quite easily drunk another one it tasted that nice!
After singing, laughing and taking the mick out of Karen Horner and Danny Whitehouse (yes Mr.President) everyone went there own seperate ways home.
Although me and Mark did sit on the Market Stalls for a while chatting then reported an unmarked taxi to the police - good deed for the month! Then it was home to bed, or the sofa to sit and watch young Kylie Minogue nearly get her baps out as a teenage delinquent!
Up for work this morning feeling horrible but battling through!
So that was my weekend - you can all wake up now! xx
posted by Anonymous @ 1:00 PM
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