Drought over

Friday, friends were thin on the ground........Decided to go out at 7.15pm with Spug and make the most of it!!
Needn't have worried, once in Spoons settled down and within the hour were joined by, Tracy (who fights men) Caroline, Dirty Danny (who was just having 4 pints, then getting the 253 up to work to do the 10-6 shift!), New Cleck bender James, Mark and Mikey...........result!
Bumped into Jordie who i've not seen for 5 years and had a good old natter.
Most of us moved to the Turnstiles and James told me his whole sob story about splitting up with the older James, told him if he ever needed a friend he could txt me, so he put my number in his phone to get in touch if he wanted to go out.
Next thing we'd had a few drinks and he asked me to have a child with him, told him once i'd Married Matt, had his children, then spawned a couple for MJ married and divorced Alan i might be free around 2023.

All traipsed up to the Station and there was Tina and Beth sneaking out of the toilets (we're staying in as we're poor and working until 9pm and then up again for work Sat a.m.......AS IF!!).
Tina and I sang, then we all went to the Benson and Hedges club, behind us in the queue was Chris Rhodes,Phworr....... how fit is he?

Rasta d.j played me ice-cube and kissed me with his big rubber lips, i was physically repulsed and dashed to the bar for more redstripe to get rid of the taste.

We were boogying away then Tina and Beth bellowed in unison, "there's Squaddie"... he was shaking his bootie with some lady who looked like she was wearing a wedding dress, turned out to be cousin Debra in some scary flowing gown thing! silly me!!! Had a dance then he went to sit with all his family, he introduced them all one by one (felt like i was at some arranged f*cking marriage ceremony). Then gave me loads of money to get me him and Neil a drink, went over to Neil who was looking lovely as ever, new beard to top off his image, asked him what he would like to drink, the only word i could get out of him was "beer".

Turned round and there were Ruth and Mark interrogating poor Mr.Jackson.I shot off to chat to Chris Rhodes, who had had a bust up with his bird..(i'll go out with you) Bit of memory loss ensued, then GJ was trying to wrestle me to the floor in currymasters, not happy i walked off.he was bellowing across the road, "come back i was only kidding" more memory loss, martini and sleeping.

Saturday morning, some bedroom athletics and conversation topics, bulldog for Mum's 60th, chickens, scotch eggs, cross stitching, Ben's new found modelling career (the jigsaws are now in stock at AS's).

He left 11ish clutching his cold donner kebab pizza, i made him take home with him. He was going to give it to Neil as a gift.

I went back to sleep for a while then drove to Mcdonalds for some junk food.
Got ready to go out only to receive 2 pathetic txt messages from Spug saying how tired she was and she wouldn't be much company..........What the f*ck???
Had a complete panic attack, didn't have any friends to go out with, phoned everyone i knew nearly in tears, even txt new bender friend Jamz (as he spells it, how gay?).
Was saved by Tina (i've only had 3 hrs sleep, have worked all day and have to do a 14 hr shift tomorrow, also i can hardy walk coz of my sciatica) and Beth, hooray.........great mates.

Phoned Whitter as had an hour to spare, got to Spoons at 8.30pm, confronted Jamz who hadn't txt coz he'd no credit....Hmmm!
Sat with him and Danny who wasn't orange anymore, he was bright RED! and some other randoms, 1 guy who looked like a bulldog chewing a wasp, he hadn't been laid in 4 yrs and showed me a video clip of himself w*nking on his phone.

Another geezer in a bulls shirts drinking guinness, a man with sticky eyes and a girl with brown hair wearing a watch. God what a car crash, coronas, cidre ala blackcurrant, i snogged an ugly man in the Turnstiles beacuse he bough me a drink, he stuck his tongue down my throat, i nearly choked, if i'd have known he was going to do that i'd have held out for 2 pints..........snook out the back door and up to Beethams thong wearing disco/karaoke!!!!!
Regal......Steven was in there with his pals, he told me to look after Adam, so i did, literally.................oh dear i was in so much bother!!!

Beth was getting jiggy with Steven for a change, Danny was spilling lager everywhere, i was inviting Jamz to come and live with me until his flat's ready!!! but only him, not his chiwawa.........what a mess!
Taxi home with Beth, Tina and their takeaways.

Yesterday all plans went to pot! Kay came to cut my hair, then i couldn't go swimming coz i had nice hair, didn't go to the flicks coz Steven was cross with me! So had a pork pie and went back to bed.

Got up, did chores, then met the expectant parents, sister and back together boyfriend and Spug...had a few in spoons...home and watched the Green mile and had a cry....oh it's a good film!! Cofee as in the drink, but not spelt the same.